it's dreamwalker here, ready to review your piece!
Okay so, first the critique!
My head thumped successively, one after the other getting worse and worse.
Successively doesnt seem like a really good word choice in this area. Yes it works, but it just doesnt seem quite right. Try a thesauraus. I'm sure theres a word there that could bring this story out a lot more.
I tried to focus my vision; it took a lot of effort until finally I could make out the dark brown wall in front of me.
Okay so this is just a little habit of mine when it comes to reviews. There is nothing wrong with using a semi colon. I just despise them with a passion. There's ways to get around them, but I guess if it's necessary to your piece then go right ahead. I just dont really much care for semicolons.
There was a window looking out to dark trees to my left, just a plain window no decorations.
Keep the window description with the window and the dark trees to the left afterwards. For example "There was a window, plain with no decorations, to the left with a view of dark, menacing trees." Something like that. Be creative but keep it together as not to confuse or annoy your reader.
And a single chair stood next to it.
Try not to start a sentence with the word 'and'. It's not politically correct. Take the word and out or connect that sentence to the prior one with a comma.
I felt fear and nervousness start tingle away
There should be 'to' between 'start' and 'tingle'.
I was tied to a chair by tough, scratchy ropes. They were tied around my arms and legs rendering me useless to moving the chair if I tried, and my chest.
There are ways to make this shorter, more precise. For example "My arms, legs, and chest were tied down to the chair by rough, scratchy ropes, rendering me completely useless". That way it'll sound well thought out and put together.
I almost fell backwards in fright and despair.
The word despair doesnt fit quite right and feels like it's over describing it. Take it out or replace it with 'from the sound'.
He was all bruised in the face, with little scratches and big cuts.
Again try rewording this bit. "His face was bruised up and scratched everywhere, ranging from some cuts to large gashes"
(I guess you could say disgraceful)
This does not need the brackets. Use comma's instead. You're talking to the reader anyways of inner thoughts. There arent such thing as inner inner thoughts for everything is an inner thought in a sense.
He had no shoes on and his feet appeared to be swollen. His eyes were swollen, and they had a very dark red tinge.
Very redundant. Dont overuse the word swollen by putting it in two sentences, back to back.
Not any compassion but a compassion for me.
This doesnt make much sense. Try "Not just a sympathetic compassion showing that he felt for my own situation, but a compassion so deep, so strange, that it felt as if it were directed just to me."
“You mean you committed a crime,” I asked.
Use a question mark, silly
I saw the shadow of the figure behind me on the wall in front of me because of the single candle on the chair next to the window.
This doesn make much sense. Watch what your doing in your sentence work, or you might screw it up.
(if that is possible for a skeleton).
Again, no need of brackets.
alright, so my overall opinion?
I enjoyed this bit quite a lot. It has a tone of potential and an interesting feel that you dont get from every book. I'm excited to find out more that happens and enjoyed this a lot.
Work on your structure a little more and I'm sure in no time my critiques will be slim to none!
Ciao
-The.Dreamwalker