HELLO, THIS IS THE NEXT PART OF MY BOOK, SPLIT PPERSONALITIES (OPEN TO A NEW TITLE!!) ENJOY!
I was snapped out of my reverie by a tap tap tap on the door. The staccato jingle felt like nails to my ears. The only thing that made me answer was my common sense. Damn, I commented on my stupidity, why hadn’t I at least snatched something off the rack?
My heart rate boomed up again, and I felt adrenaline build up inside me. The small lock on the door wouldn’t last for long against one of the men outside, let alone two. But somehow, I didn’t think that they would knock on the door if they were just going to barge in here and kill me, or take me hostage. Inside the small enclosure started to feel claustrophobic. What if this was it? What if this was all I would remember of my life? It couldn’t happen like this, nothing like this ever happened in real life, only in TV shows and movies.
Time lost its’ meaning while I was huddled up in that small cubicle, waiting for death to arrive. It came sooner than I thought, sooner than I was ready. But when death did speak, it wasn’t in a harsh voice, rasping for breath like I had imagined in my dream, all that time ago in the hellhole of a place to wake up. Instead, it came with a warning, in a sweet but fed up voice.
“Look doll, are you just going to hide in there all day again, or are you going to come out and tell me why you keep on doing this?”
What?
She racked her knuckles on the door again, waiting for my reply.
Just like that I had another piece of the puzzle, a direction from the talking bird in the labyrinthine of my past. I was too shocked to do anything; I couldn’t even stop my hands from shaking as they quickly turned to a pale white.
My entire body had shut down, I couldn’t open my mouth to answer the sales clerk, let alone ask her my queries.
Oh, but how much I wanted to, how many times I had thought of this moment, finally finding someone who knew me, or had seen to me before the accident, if it was even an accident. How many times I had imagined this moment through and through. But it had never been like thins. Never had I imagined huddling up in the corner of a changing room, on the verge of tears, one thought rebounding, reverberating, resurfacing.
I came in here before. But what does this mean? Did I come in for a shop, and then go into hysterics and lock myself in the changing rooms, or was I doing the same thing as I was now, hiding from men that I had a hunch were about to kill me.
Had a hunch. Even I realized how pathetic that sounded. And even if it did turn out that they were from a government agency and really were out to get me, then what could I do? Would I just sit in here for the rest of my life, or would I, could I, do something? I remembered back to the fatal moment in the compound, back when I first saw myself with my new eyes. I probably could outrun those men, the mysterious figures that were coming to take me away, that was if they were. They did seem big enough that they wouldn’t be able to fit into most of the places that I might, and they wouldn’t be able to weave in and out of the crowd like I could. Maybe it was worth a try.
But then… they saw me when I was ducking into the shop, didn’t they, and that means that they could be out there, right now.
I banged my head on the mirror and groaned. It was the worst thing in the world not knowing. If I knew where they were, then I could head in the opposite direction, but being trapped in this cubby hole, I had no idea. They could be outside right now. They could be munching on my abandoned cookie for all that I knew.
A rumbling came from down low, and I cursed myself for letting my un-named passenger take control so soon.
Another second and I could be chomping my cookie in here. Thanks a lot! Deciding that the entire situation was useless, I unlocked the door, and slowly peeked through as I opened it. The shop clerk was standing there, hands on hips, but with a satisfied look on her face. Just in the background, there was a tinkle of a bell. Two men in heavy looking suits walked into the shop, and looked around.
“Finally, are you going to tell me wha-”
“Look” I whispered. “I’ll be back tomorrow, and tell you everything, but please… Don’t let those men over there know who I am, or where I went.”
She looked shocked, but I knew that time was leaving me. I ducked behind the nearest sales rack and followed it to the end. One glance up and I realized what they were doing.
Still standing at the entrance, they were scanning any sign of me, and then just as my head disappeared again, the one on the left walked back out.
They’re blocking off all of the exits! I carefully deliberated, which means that I’m going to be squared off unless I move fast…I kept low, but my feet were warmed up now, and the running shoes I woke up in were doing their job. In fewer than 3 seconds I was headed into the “staff only” lounge. No doubt the sales clerk’s going to be confused by my hasty departure, but as soon as she sees me enter this door, I was in trouble. What I hadn’t counted on was the room being filled.
Okay, it wasn’t exactly filled, but here were at least five people that were enjoying their dinner break, all of which felt some obligation to stop me. I looked around the room for a quick escape.
It wasn’t like those spy movies, where there’s a door right next to the hero and they zip through it without anyone noticing. This was real life, or as real as you can get in my situation. The emergency exit was on the far side of the room.
By the time I’d taken two steps forward, all of the workers were sanding on their feet, coffee cups down, and staring at me.
“What are you doing? You’re not allowed in here!” A bald man down the back stated.
“I was…” the words flew out of my mouth without time for thought. I took two steps forward, only ten to go now. “Looking for mum” 9… 8… 7…
I was more or less surprised that they weren’t advancing on me, like a pack of lions taking down a hyena for invading their territory.
What happened next wasn’t really a surprise; a little piece of me was expecting it to happen all along. In fact, why it took so long was a shock. I almost wanted it to happen, to save me from risking a mistake in this dreadful situation.
I decided to get one last word in before it happened, to prove that I was in control, more or less.
“I’m Sarah Cellarage. Looking for Suzanne… this is Amazon, right?” I made confused gestures towards the door, making them know that I wasn’t posing any threat. It happened then, almost perfect timing.
My legs coiled and sprung, bounding across the room in three short steps. The employees were too shocked by my sudden movement that I was halfway out the door before even one of them was within a foot of me. But I was quick and nimble; wearing tight enough clothes that when he tried to snag my shirt, his fingers slid off without purchase. I slammed the door in time to be breathing in fresh air as the alarm bell rang.
I briefly wondered why I wasn’t given the wheel, until my backseat driver turned to look up the dingy ally way.
Advancing towards me, strutting tall and proud was a man in black. It only took a quick glance the other was, revealing a wire mesh fence as tall as a two story house and I knew why there was a grin on his face.
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Okay! I'm not going to go too in-depth; I'll save that for the last review you asked me for. I'll just tell you here that I liked this section a lot, especially about the abandoned cookie. That was awesome, really. 
I still think you could add emotion (mainly fear and confusion) to balance out your spunky MC's bravery and stubborness.
