Well this is the second part of the first chapter of Prince of Janovia. I have really tried to apply what you all said about punctuation and such things, so I hope it is better. I even wrote down all your tips on a piece of paper and kept it next to me. A note on some spelling, I'm English as in from the UK so neighbours is spelt with a u lol just keep it in mind that I spell differently to Americans
So enjoy and let me know what you think. Please don't be put off by the length!Note: 'Whilst' is a normal part of my vocabulary lol I don't consider it an old word
I took your suggestions onboard and edited. So I hope it is a little clearer about Mailan and other such things
I can't believe I forgot to change the ending! lol I've done it now though.
Chapter 1 Part 2
Blaine endeavored to keep a polite smile on his face, whilst trying not to rise to Mailan’s bait. The man was infuriating, but powerful, and not a man to cross lightly. “I will keep that in mind for the next meeting, Lord Mailan.”
Mailan smiled smugly, obviously satisfied that he had embarrassed Blaine. They kept their eyes locked on each other a minute too long, neither wishing to give way and seem the weaker of the two. The other nobles shifted awkwardly in their seats but none spoke or acknowledged the battle of wills in front of them.
King Gorsed coughed deep in his throat to regain attention. “Yes, well. Let us proceed with the meeting.”
Mailan gave Blaine one last glare then dramatically turned his full attention to the King, making it evident that Blaine wasn’t worth his time. Typical Mailan, always wanting to keep in the King's favor, Blaine thought to himself whilst still glowering at the back of Mailan’s head.
King Gorsed sighed and continued. “A matter has arisen that has caused me much worry and grief.”
Blaine’s eyes flicked quickly from Mailan’s head to his father’s face. It was odd for his father, the King, to talk in this way, especially at an alliance meeting. He was now just noticing how tired his father looked, deep circles resided under his eyes and there was concern etched into his features.
“The guards along the southern border have reported sightings of certain beings,” King Gorsed announced.
A low murmur ran around the table as the nobles whispered to their neighbours. King Gorsed raised a hand and the nobles fell silent, diligently awaiting the next piece of information. “From the descriptions recounted to me, I am certain that these beings are Morlongs.”
Shocked gasps and cries of outrage mingled with worry followed the revelation. Some nobles appeared to be too astonished by the news to have any sort of reaction other than sitting, staring, mouths slightly ajar. Blaine simply sat back in his seat, staring at his hands, waiting and trying to make sense of the news. Morlongs? They had not been seen in or near Janovia for almost fifty years. How could it now be possible that they were roaming the southern border, so close?
“Morlongs? Preposterous!” Mailan’s voice carried above the sudden melee of noise that filled the grand hall.
“Do you doubt your King, Lord Mailan?” King Gorsed said, once again recovering the attention of the other nobles. Now only a few still whispered.
“Of Course not, Your Majesty. However, reports are just that, reports,” Mailan moved slightly, obviously uncomfortable with questioning his King.
“I have personally investigated these claims, Lord Mailan. There is no doubt in my mind that it is Morlongs we are dealing with.”
“But can you be certain? Most of the guards along the southern border are not yet thirty. All they know of Morlong’s is from from… bedtime stories!” Mailan practically shrieked the final words. Blaine noticed that the man seemed adamant in his disbelief, apparently indignant that one might even suggest that Morlongs had returned to the Kingdom of Janovia. Blaine gave an involuntary shiver; he had to admit that the thought of their return was truly terrifying.
Without warning King Gorsed slammed his fist on the table, his eyes were incensed with rage at Mailan’s words. “Some of us are still old enough to remember the Morlong’s brutal ways, Mailan. I will not take reports like this lightly!” King Gorsed’s fist loosened and the tension residing in his forehead relaxed. He turned away from Mailan and addressed the rest of the alliance. “I propose to travel to the southern border and reside there till such time that I myself might see these beings, perhaps that will satisfy, Lord Mailan.”
Blaine decided that this was the time to speak and voice his doubts. “Father, I do not think it is wise for you to risk yourself in this way. Have someone go in your place, someone else who also knows of Morlongs.”
King Gorsed smiled kindly, as though Blaine was just a small child that had spoken nonsensical words. “Hush Blaine, this is a matter for older men.”
Blaine shook his head in disbelief whilst his father moved on to discuss the matter with the nobles. Controlling his anger, Blaine drew his chair back, scraping it loudly on the floor as he stood. He took one last look at the gathered alliance and then turned, striding towards the door.
“Where are you going, my son?”
Blaine reached the door and placed his hand on the circular knocker. “It is my understanding that my opinion is not welcome here…Your Majesty. So therefore, neither am I,” with that he pulled the door open and stepped outside the grand hall.
As the door swung back to its shut position one word reached Blaine’s ears, “Preposterous!” Lord Mailan cried and then the door shut.
Blaine ran his hands through his brown hair in frustration. He felt the urge to kick something but knew it was futile; it would not relieve his anger against his father. This always happened, he would suggest something and his father would snub him, claiming he was too young, too inexperienced, not in a position to comment or any number of excuses not to take him seriously. He was so sick of it! He rubbed the back of his neck and breathed deeply attempting to compose himself. It would not do for the Prince to be seen out of control. When he eventually felt calm enough he turned away from the grand hall and made his way down the stairs that led to the main entrance of the castle’s keep.
When he reached the bottom Blaine could see through the huge oak doors that invited people into the hub of Castle Lenbard. He saw the moon begin its rise into the night sky, its light catching on the high walls defending his home. Blaine needed time to think, to be alone before Caswallan confronted him. The man always wanted to know every single detail about the Alliance Meetings and Blaine definitely did not want to talk about it. Blaine decided that the best place for solitude was the secluded walled garden in the castle’s courtyard. However before he could take a step towards freedom, a young servant boy came galloping down the stairs. It was too late-- Blaine had been spotted.
“Prince Blaine!” the boy continued his run towards Blaine teetering on his toes to stop, almost toppling into his Prince and bringing them both down onto the hard stone floor.
“Yes?” Blaine did not look at the boy but kept his eyes on the threshold that led to the moonlit landscape.
“King Gorsed insists on your return to the Alliance meeting, Your Highness,” the boy smiled, clearly happy with himself for remembering the message.
“What is your name boy?”
“Castra, Your Highness,” The boy bowed.
Blaine kept his eyes fixed ahead of him. “Well, Castra. You can tell my fath…King Gorsed that when he is ready to hear my opinion, he will enjoy my presence,” and with that he strode across the entrance and out into the night. He left Castra standing there, looking utterly bewildered.
******
The iron gate swung forward with a slow creak as Blaine entered the walled garden. He closed it behind him and stared around smiling slightly. A fountain stood in the centre, water slowly trickling down to fall in a small pond. The light of the moon was reflected in the rippling water, illuminating the garden with a silver glow. Wild flowers native only to Janovia edged the base of the fountain and thick carefully pruned bushes encircled the outer edge of the paving, creating a sense of privacy.
It was one of Blaine’s favorite places in the whole Janovian Kingdom. He had been coming here since he was a young boy. It was his place of escape from the formality of the castle. He moved forward through an arched doorway cut into the hedge, to a carved stone bench that lay opposite the fountain. Blaine settled himself down, leaning back against the hedge and closing his eyes, he steadily drew in the night air.
How long Blaine sat, relishing the silence and tranquility, he didn’t know but when he opened his eyes the moon was at its zenith and shone across the whole walled garden. Blaine was surprised that Caswallan hadn’t come to find him yet. Although, he realised, the alliance meeting would still be in session and his friend and servant probably didn’t know that he had stormed out.
He stayed knowing he should go but he did not wish to move, there was something so serene about the nighttime, the air smelt fresh and the breeze was cool across his skin. Here he could pretend, just for a little while, that he wasn’t the King’s son, that he didn’t have the weight of expectation upon his shoulders and that he didn’t have to watch his every word and every deed.
A slow creak reached Blaine’s ears through the silence. His gaze shifted towards the archway that led to the fountain. He knew that creak; every time he came to this garden he made that creak. It was the iron gate he’d used earlier, the only way in and out of the garden. Blaine shook his head; it was probably Caswallan coming to fetch him after finding out about his conduct earlier. He smoothed down his tunic and standing up he faced the fountain. He watched the ripples of water in the pond, waiting. He could hear footsteps sounding on the path; they came closer and closer until they stopped behind him.
“I know what you’re going to say Caswallan,” Blaine sighed, turning to face his assistant.
Blaine’s heart lurched as he instinctively took a step back, his hand going straight to the hunting knife at his side.
Melting into the dark shadows a figure stood, tall, silent and still. The black clothes and a hood covering the head blurred the shape and only the eyes were visible. The eyes…. Blaine had never seen anything like those eyes, bright and sapphire blue.
Janovians did not have blue eyes; theirs were brown, green, and hazel. Blaine had never seen blue eyes in his entire life. He was fascinated, captivated but it also made him wary. This stranger had to have come from outside the Janovian kingdom, a place Blaine had never been.
Blaine clutched the handle of his hunting knife tighter. “Who are you or…what are you?”
The stranger did not answer but advanced on Blaine. Blaine stepped further back. “State your purpose stranger!”
“The King, I have to find the King,” the voice was muffled and a little strange through the material covering the lower half of the face but Blaine could tell it was a female.
It made him falter and once again they both stood staring at each other in silence. The stranger looked him up and down as if assessing him. “How do I get into the castle?”
Blaine was surprised she even managed to get into the castle grounds. By this time the guards should have locked the main gates. Suddenly, taking Blaine off guard, the stranger skillfully slipped a knife from her sleeve and ran at him so fast he barely had time to react. Grabbing her by the wrist he twisted the knife wielding hand up her back and held her, forcing her arm painfully
“I will not let you harm the King,” His voice was a whisper in her ear and when she did not speak Blaine pushed the arm further up her back causing her to cry out and drop the knife.
“I do not want to hurt him! I…need…I just need help.”
She seemed to crumble then, sagging, her weight held up only by her arm. Blaine too relaxed his hold slightly and gazed down upon her head. It was a mistake and one he shouldn’t have made. He paid for it. She straightened and slammed her head back into his face.
Relinquishing his grip Blaine staggered back clutching his hand to his nose, cursing as the blood flowed freely over his lips, down his chin and stained his tunic.
The woman spun round, keeping her distance from Blaine, she spoke again. “I did not want to hurt you. I need…” she did not get to finish as the slow creak of the gate sounded once again.
“Master Blaine!” It was Caswallan shouting into the darkness.
She threw a quick glance behind her. Her eyes then darted around quickly, seeking an escape route. She turned and shot Blaine one last look, he was shocked to see the pleading in those sapphire eyes. He stepped towards her but she recoiled and fled through one of the arches, disappearing into the darkness.
Blaine used his sleeve to wipe away some of the blood covering his nose, just in time to see Caswallan rush, breathless through the entrance. “There you are Master Blaine! I’ve been looking everywhere…” he glanced at Blaine and his mouth fell open. “What happened?”
“It’s nothing, I just…just…tripped,” Blaine hastened to wipe the rest of the blood away on his sleeve.
Caswallan shook his head, dismissing Blaine's words and hurried on with his mission “Never mind, Never mind. I have to talk to you!”
The fact that the little man did not press the issue, Blaine thought, was rather odd. He decided to deflect his assistant away from further inquiry by confessing to his misdemeanor. “I know, Caswallan. I shouldn’t have left the Alliance Meeting.”
"Oh no, Sir. No, no It's much more terrible than that," Caswallan began to frantically pull Blaine by his sleeve back towards the castle. "It's terrible, just terrible. How could it happen here, all the guards, gates locked, locked! No one realised, they found, lots of blood..."
Blaine stopped then and grabbed Caswallan by the shoulders. "Blood? What's happened?"
Caswallan's form drooped slightly. “A murder, Sir. At the castle.”
I was thinking of not continuing this as it was supposed to be an exercise in writing but I have a feeling people may throttle me if I don't, including my Dad. Thanks for reading!
