Darkness

They say It gets darker before dawn,
well I say this darkness has gone on too long.
I also heard them say,
without winter, spring would not be so pleasant
Enough with this talk of weather
for my heart may not survive the cold.
Will I live through this night,
This starless night?

Overall, it's not bad, but I feel more like it's a beginning than a whole poem. It could use some more detail, a little more imagery to show what exactly you're talking about. I have no idea why the narrator thinks they may not survive the night. What's actually going on here?

Also, decide if you're rhyming or not. You start and end with sort-of rhyming couplets, but the middle's free verse. Personally, I'd go with free verse, because that allows you to focus less on finding a good rhyme and more on finding the best word. If you do, however, I'd cut out anything that rhymes because it's distracting and the reader's left confused, wondering if the whole thing was supposed to rhyme or not.

Also, clean up your grammar/punctuation a little. It's "I", not "i". Plus I think "I also heard say" is missing a word. Did you mean "I've also heard said"? Or "I also heard them say".

Now, to end on a positive note, I thought the last four lines were beautiful. Keep it up and good luck editing!

Really not bad. i think that a period should have gone at hte end of the first sentence. in the second line you made an error. Correction:'I also heard "They" say'.

Ooooh, I like this! Very neat and compact. I love the "enough with this talk of weather" line.

That being said, the corrections other people have given certainly stand. Fix the grammar, it's awful at the moment! And "i" looks sooo unprofessional!

This poem could refer to any of a vast number of things. For me, my first reaction was to see it as a political poem, though that might not be how you wrote it. I suppose you have to decide whether you want it to be specific or vague (and don't just pick vague because it's easy way out!). "Vague" isn't the right word; what I mean is open-ended, where people can use it to relate to their own times or predicaments. Of course, specifics that evoke emotions often work even better for this... Anyway, if you want it specific, one thing you could do would be to change the title to refer to a specific circumstance. "The Bush Administration" or something (preferably something a little more fitting and poetic). "Darkness" is a pretty weak title in my opinion, anyway.

Ok, hope that helped! Like I said, I loved the idea and the basic wording and flow. Keep working on it!
-BFG