Ok, here we go. A short story I wrote about a dog debating about whether or not he should eat his masters' homework. Please leave reveiws to tell me how badly it sucks.
Ah, there it is, there it is. Paper, paper, paper. Better than a belly rub. Better than ice cubes in my bowl of water. Better than a nice scratch on the ol’… well, you get the idea.
Maybe I’ll just… walk closer and take a sniff. Just a tiny one.
Huh. Is that, is that scented marker making it’s way up my black nose? Maybe just a little bite won’t hurt…
NO! BAD DOG! BAD, BAD, BAD! Sam’s homework. He needs it for school. He’ll be so mad, I’ll never be able to eat scraps off of his plate again!
And what’s he suppose to tell his teacher? That a dog ate his homework. Pfft. Get real. Humans like Sam could come up with better excuses than that. So if he can, then there’s no hurt in eating it now…
NO! Bad Max, bad, bad, bad. Lookie here, right in my bowl there’s some very delicious, tasty, artificially flavored, meatless… grain filled… unappetizing… Oh, curse my furry little tale! No eating Sam’s homework! He’s barely passing his classes now!
Say, I wonder what subject this homework’s in. Oh, I hope it’s math! Just one little peek so I can find out…
BWAH! Not Social Studies! The most classic, tasteful, delicious homework around! It’s a Labrador’s caviar, a Poodles champagne! A Basset Hounds finely rolled cigars! I’ve heard rumors about it around the fire hydrant, but I’ve never gotten a chance to taste…
Aw, what the heck.
Paws on table, head in bag, open mouth ever so slightly. Teeth grab. Pull; not too hard! Don’t rip this tribute to the culinary arts!
It’s in my mouth! IT’S IN MY MOUTH. Head, must shake head. Oh delicious, swing tail at 95 mph. More head shaking, yes, head shaking is necessary. Yum! Better than humping a pillow! I forgive my master for taking away my manhood! Nothing could be better than this!
Gulp. It’s gone.
Oh, what a shame! Well it was nice while it lasted… Hey, what the heck happened around here? Who knocked over the coffee table? Oh no! Someone’s broken the antique photo frame of Great Aunt Sarah! Not a total loss, she was a cat owner…
And yuck! Where’d all this dog hair come from? Disgusting! Wait a minute. This… This is the same shade of hair as mine. And, and, why does my tail hurt so dang much? Did I do this?
No, no, I couldn’t have, I’m a good dog! A good dog! I ALWAYS clean up spills off the floor, even without being asked to! And all those cats that use to hang around here, well, let’s just say that they aren’t meowing on these parts.
There’s no way I could’ve done this. Absolutely no way!
Hey, what’s that sticking out of Sam’s backpack? Is that... science homework?
Gotta go.
I hope to read more from you!
