3 words that never seem to pass my lips

This is a true story so I hope it doesn't sound too much like fiction:

I love you.
Three words so simple to say,
Yet so difficult to mean,
Words that can change life in every way,
Or rip it apart at the seams.
I know that you still love her,
But I just want you to know,
I will always like her,
But I hate her ever so.
She took you away from me,
Just when I wanted us to start,
She took me, spat me out,
And completely broke my heart.
I can't help but love you,
God, can't you see?
There's nothing for me to do,
My whole world was you and me.
Don't take this the wrong way,
I know it might sound weird,
But you took my breath away
And it is so much worse than I feared.
I just can't find my voice,
To just say those words to you,
I guess I've got no choice,
But to wait and see it through.
Now, listen to me talk,
As I say these last few words,
I know I can't just walk, away,
But, oh god, it hurts.
She's my best friend,
But it just doesn't feel true,
Yet you're the one on which I can depend,
And I love you.
So watch these pills as they cut at my throat,
Look at my tears
And, by god, take note,
My dear.
You're the want thing in my life,
That I just can't live without,
I wanted to be your wife,
Now I just want to scream and shout.
My body is out of sync,
Because you're no longer here,
my heart's on the brink,
And things aren't as they appear.

I can hear them walking,
As I sit here in this bed,
They're all still talking
And constantly touching my head.
Someone's crying
But I don't care
My heart is dying
'Cause you're not there.
I've rejected all their solutions,
I'm not fit for the surgeon's knife,
If living is without you,
There's no resolution,
And slowly,
I give up fighting for life.

You're the want thing in my life,
That I just can't live without,
I wanted to be your wife,
Now I just want to scream and shout.

Just noticed a possible mistake (or I have misunderstood that particular part of the poem), so I underlined it.

Very nice (in a dark way), I have to say I'm quite worried for you if this is real life!

I'm not sure if this was intentional (if so, you have my compliments), but I quite like the ambiguity in "God, can't you see?".

Not an awful lot to criticise on, really. Good work!

My body is out of sync,


i really like that line.


I can understand if this is the way you feel, i was in nearly the exact same position at one point (i think i was fourteen then also) and all i can say is: it will end.

I know that makes no difference, and you'll only see it later on, but it will. It will get better.



poem wise, i think this could be stronger, but i know what its like when you're writing purely to get how you feel out onto paper and mine come out like this as well.
keep writing, and try and stay positive ^^