A tale unforgotten

Okay so here are a few pieces of my poetry forgive me, i am an amateur writer :

The silence of its cloak,
The sharpness of its aftermath,
Death a fatuous tale,
Misinterpreted by the mind's eye,
A revival of the spirit,
In the midst of all its foolery, I see it coming.
I am prepared.

Waking the dawn,
The soft iridescence bathing me,
Alive.
The pain not metioned, the pain not felt.

The flourish of the Lions Mane, the knowing of the Lions Roar,
Be fearful o' dear children, for this Lion, is [b]not[b] a tame Lion.

Swimming, Wondering, Thinking through empty spaces.
Fruitless efforts, feelings of remorse.
Actions unsincere, the results unclear. For I have been decieved.
A traitor, a deciever.
for I am of those things. Yet the harvest of his forgiveness has given me a new hope.

I know its not much but ill be posting some more real soon!

I think this was a very good piece.........i hope you weren't expecting help on grammar..1. i wouldn't notice..2. it wouldn't matter to me...(as u can tell )........ anyway i liked this very much . i wish it could been longer, a little more imagery maybe.... Still awesome, good job!!! !

I really liked it. i think you've done a good job! my opinion may not count much but I hope it might help you.
i particulary like

Waking the dawn,

The soft iridescence bathing me,

Alive.

The pain not metioned, the pain not felt.

Well, continue writing!

im unsure about your meaning but its probably just me being too lazy to figure it out


i really rather liked this, you have some great potential. a lot of 14 yr old poetry on here can be dire but i look forward to seeing how you progress ^^

Thanks, I really appreciated this Ill keep on trying btw @scribblingquill: Most of my poetry is based on symbolic scripiture having to do with somewhat the Bible, but I get most of my inspiration with C.S Lewis writings. ^.^

That was a really good piece of poetry.
I enjoyed it and thought that it sounded AMAZING.
Scribblingquill is right, you really do have potential,
I have a suggestion for you,
why dont you try getting some of your writing published in a book or something?
Im sure you could go far having heaps of potential.
you are so much better than me,
I only posted about two of my poems so far and I havent had anyone leave me a review yet, your doing so much better than I am as you already have people leaving you reviews!

I enjoyed this piece! It was very thorough and beautiful. It is very.....dramatic and.... another word that I do not know I don't look for grammar errors or spelling errors because I believe anyone who can put words togather well(like your poem ) should be praised for it and honored for having such talent. Great job!