How to make trick-or-treaters hate you!

The point is just to write as many funny ways to make trick-or-treaters hate you. All I ask is that you keep it PG-13, and number the ways.

I'll start.

1. Give them a menu and have them order their candy. Keep asking if they want to see the wine list.

2. After giving them their candy, hand them a bill.

3. Open the door and act like you're the trick-or-treater, not them.

5. Fling open the door, point a stick at them and scream, "AVADA KADAVRA! AVADA KADAVRA! DIE YOU STUPID MUGGLE!"

6. Lecture them on the risks of taking candy from strangers.

Answer the door and then disappear for ages and ages, apparently looking for the sweets but really just watch TV or something.

A rather old comic I drew once:

ROTFLMAO very good if a bit early . Still very funny.

love the: "AVADA KADAVRA! AVADA KADAVRA! DIE YOU STUPID MUGGLE!"

I wonder have you rad Ogden Nash's poem about trick-or-treaters?

nyway

Tell them to add their names to the waiting list and if its any form of undead say: "SILENCE!! I KIIIILLLL YOU!!!!" and close the door

If someone shows up dressed as a skeleton or a zombie, start shouting cleric spells at them.

If they're anything else, a Magic Missile should do the trick.

Give them fruit instead of candy. I hated that when I was little. I always wanted the sweets, not a friggin apple.

Fruit is too tasty, Conrad. Give them vegetables. Celery. Broccoli. Maybe some Brussels sprouts.

Yeah, vegetables are much better for that.

Or, a person could dress up like a scarecrow and sit really still on the porch. Then, when the trick or treaters come up and think you're just a mannequin, you jump up and scare the living pooh out of them.

I'va already had that happen to me. I nearly jumped out of my skin. But hay little kids scare easily and I was like eight.

My next door neighbor's dad used to do that. He'd dress up as the grim reaper and wait outside of his house. It was always so fun to see him scare all of the tricker treaters.

14. Hand out tooth brushes and floss.

This comic says it all.

EDIT:
I should probably put in a caveat that this comic is PG-13 and mildly offensive.

that was funny.
but i really hope my dad doesn't come and look at the history on my pc

haha. funny comics.

16. Okay, wear dark sunglasses and label a briefcase "Top Secret." Open the door a crack, whisper, "It's about time you got here," give them the briefcase and slam the door.

17. Ask them to come in and look at your dishwasher because it's making unnatural "whirring" sound.

18. Open the door dressed as a giant fish. Collapse. Don't move or say anything until they're gone.

Jamie_rocks wrote:haha. funny comics.

16. Okay, wear dark sunglasses and label a briefcase "Top Secret." Open the door a crack, whisper, "It's about time you got here," give them the briefcase and slam the door.

17. Ask them to come in and look at your dishwasher because it's making unnatural "whirring" sound.

18. Open the door dressed as a giant fish. Collapse. Don't move or say anything until they're gone.

lol. that one made me laugh.

Yeah, I would do that, but I'm not staying home and passing out on free candy.