walking and getting nowhere

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Walking and Getting Nowhere

Sitting in the deafening silence
Contemplating the end
Forgetting the beginning
Wondering how long there is
left to go

The horizon still seems so far off
The longer I walk the further I seem to get
I want to stop
Breathe

Don’t think I can go much further
Starting to drag my feet
Nothing to hold onto
Nothing to support my weight

Falling
I am falling
Wondering how long there is
left to go
This just can’t be the end

There must be something beyond that horizon
But how?
How can I get there?
I am walking and getting nowhere
Last edited by Dark Star on Tue Sep 02, 2008 11:56 pm, edited 1 time in total.




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Oh, and my big red EMO stamp had gone unused for so long!

*stamps*

Yes, unfortunately I find the poem rather "emo" and bland. Why, tell me, should I as a reader care what this speaker is talking about so vaguely? It's very difficult to take something away from a poem that is mostly babble taken directly out of the sad poetic journals of so many teenagers.

My advice is to scrap this one, honestly--I know it sounds a little harsh, but you'd be better off with a clean slate! Why don't you tell us, the readers, something in your own words? Something unique to you? A situation you have been in or invented, something concrete and specific and beautiful in its own way? Why borrow from others when you've got your own head, eh?

-Colleen
"My pet, I've been to the devil, and he's a very dull fellow. I won't go there again, even for you..."




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Gender Female
Points 890
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im not sure what you mean...though i do appreciate your comments...could you plz be more spacifac? thanx again!



The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all is the person who argues with him.
— Stanislaw Jerszy Lec