The Theme Generator Sagas

"Your story is about a construction worker in a mental institution appreciating alliteration."


The place was white, white on white on white. The walls were white, the tables were white, and the

chairs were white. Thomas Thimble was strapped to a chair. The built-in straps were brown, perhaps

the only source of color in the room. Thimble gurgled happily, deep in his throat.


"Buzzing Bees Barf Blueberiessssszzzz!!!" He spouted, unable tlo control his blubbering

lips. A male nurse entered the room, followed by another woman.

"He was hit by a falling hammer," the nurse whispered. The woman nodded, not taking her

eyes off the blubbering Thimble.

"Your Yellow--"

"Thomas Thimble!"

"Thumbs Tailor Tinkering—“

"Does he ever speak coherently?"

"Mr. Thimble, could you please prove that you understand us?"

"Understanding Underwear Undermine Underwire."

"Do you feel any pain?"

“Painful Pennies Perpetrate Pooping Porpoises.”

“Mr. Thomas Thimble, if you truly are unable to communicate with us coherently, raise your

right hand…please, but if you are able to communicate, raise your left hand.”

Thimble paused.

“Right Retarded Ribbons Rant.”

The therapist’s face turned a deep shade of vermillion.

“This Thomas Thimble Torments--”

She slapped a hand to her mouth. Thomas Thimble began to laugh, a sound that

transformed the white of his prison into a beautiful electric blue.

A small hammer lay on an examination counter, the very one that had taken Thomas’s

wits. The male nurse entered the room, closing the door behind him. He picked it up and headed

towards a trash can.

The hammer squiggled, then said at the top of its voice, “I’m not crazy!!!”

*blinks*

That last sentence was... odd. It didn't really fit with the rest of the story, to suddenly have a talking hammer. Though, since it did "take his wits", it only follows that it should use those wits, eh? Did I get it?

Anyway, I really liked this, though the formatting seemed a little funky. Is that intentional, or did YWS mess with it and change it around? Personally, I see no reason for it being like it is, so I'd fix it and make it a more conventional format.

"Squiggled" seems like an odd choice of words for the motion of the hammer. I know what you mean, but I don't think "squiggle" can be used in that sense. A more conventional "wiggle" might do better.

Otherwise, this was great. I love that theme generator. Some wacky stuff comes out of it sometimes. Congrats on a great story from it!

~GryphonFledging

I really enjoyed this, right from the start I felt like I was in the room with Mr Thimble. the imagery was sharp and focussed, which made it easy to see in my mind. I loved the line

"a sound that transformed the white of his prison into a beautiful electric blue."

it was so vivid that i could almost see the room changing through Mr. Thimble's eyes. I also liked how it was described as a prison (even though Mr Thimble didn't seem to mind that he was there) which gave it another dimantion, almost as if it was written half by a sane mind and half by Mr Thimble himself.

Just two issues that I had when reading it:

"The therapist’s face turned a deep shade of vermillion....She slapped a hand to her mouth."

-Maybe it's just me, but I didn't understand why the therapist is so shocked...it seemed uncharacteristic of a therapist, who would be used to crazy people. Although this maybe would have worked if the character was well established, in a longer story perhaps, but for the purposes of your story I didn't really feel that it was well suited.

Also, with regard to your last line, I thought it was unnecessary, it didn't really come from or amount to anything. I personally think the overall efect of the story would be more powerful if you omitted the last line alltogether. Then it would end with the disposal of the thing which had changed Mr. Thimble's life. The contrast of the hammer being part of the most defining moment of the rest of his life, but then being thrown away with the trash as if it is unimportant would send a much more powerful ending than the "what the...?" ending of the talking hammer.

plus the funny double spacing, as mentioned above.

Otherwise this is an amazing story. I read it about 3 times just now and I'll definitely return to read it again. I wish i could write stories this good from a generator!!! I look forward to reading more of your work.

I agree. And I also LOVE the generator! Some weird stuff like this comes out a lot, yeah, but it's really interesting that way! Oh, FYI, at the end, the hammer stole his wits, basically took all his intelligence. So that means the hammer can speak. I don't know. It was completely random.