Snow White- After the Poison Apple

blacktiger3915 · 2008-02-06T17:53:29Z

The story takes place in a far away land. With hills and trees as far as you can see. A white castle sat at the top of the largest hill. Snow White and Prince Charming were riding towards the castle on the white stallion. Charming just rescued Snow from the fat troll that lived under the bridge. “Thank you for saving me sweetie.” said Snow to her prince. “I’m tired of saving your ass” said Charming under his breath. “What? What did you say?” “Nothing, I said nothing.” “Anyway, we have been together for 5 months; so, when are we going to get married?” questioned Snow. He didn’t say anything. “Charming?” “What?! What do you want?” Charming said angrily. “I just wanted to know when we were getting married?” “Can we please have quiet on the way home?” They both were quiet on the way to the castle. Snow got off the horse and headed in the living room when they arrived. Charming tied the horse up and walked were Snow was. “Clean up around here, his palace is a mess.” ordered Charming. “The maids can take care of that so I can take care of you.” she said while putting her arms around his shoulders. “Oh, I forgot to tell you that I fired the maids and cooks.” he explained while throwing her arms off of him. “Why?” “Why pay them when I have you do it for free?” laughed Charming. “I can’t do this by myself! Are you going to help me?” “Fuck no. Call up your damn animal friends to help you. And tell them to don’t shit on my floor.” Charming said as he started to walk away. “Where are you going?” asked Snow. “None of your business.” he said as he walked out the door. A year past and Snow and Charming still didn’t get married. Charming was coming back from a long trip. He still looked young and fresh, but Snow White gained weight and lost her beautiful glow. Charming now called her Off White to piss her off. “Where have you been? You’ve been gone for 5 days!” screamed Snow. “Who the fuck you yelling at?” he said in her face. “I’m going to leave you.” Snow said seriously,"And where are you going to go?” “The same place were I have sex because I'm not gettin' any from you! You are fat. I don't want to have sex with a fat bitch! That is why I leave for some time, so I can fuck other princesses.” “Who?” “Sleeping Beauty. All I had to do to get some was to wake her up out of her sleep. I left her and went to a party and that is were I met my girlfriend Cinderella. All I had to do was to get a shoe from Payless and give it to her.” “You are heartless! Well, you can go with her while I go to the cottage in the woods” said Snow. “To the dwarfs? They are so little, they can’t provide you with nothing! Not sexually anyway” screamed Charming. “Don’t let their size fool you.” exclaimed Snow,” I can’t wait to go back to Doc, Dopey, Sneezy, and the rest of the crew.” “Bye Sleezy!” shouted Charming. So they went on their separate ways. Prince Charming married Cinderella and Snow White went back to live with the 7 dwarfs who sung “Hi Hoe!” when she returned. And I guess they lived happily ever after.

Juniper

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Fri Jul 11, 2008 5:34 pm

Juniper says... · Fri Jul 11, 2008 5:34 pm

This was hysterically funny! I love it when people add on or put a twist to fairy tales. This was so funny, because it kind of shows that Prince Charming is a traitor, since he went with snow white, cinderella, aurora, and all of the other fairy-tale-princesses. If you noticed, he really did, haha.

I love it, thumbs up and star for this peice!

"I'd steal somebody's purse if I could google it and then download it." -- Firestarter

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blacktiger3915

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Sun Jul 13, 2008 3:14 am

blacktiger3915 says... · Sun Jul 13, 2008 3:14 am

thank you

Don't send sheep to kill a wolf.

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blacktiger3915

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Sun Jul 13, 2008 3:14 am

blacktiger3915 says... · Sun Jul 13, 2008 3:14 am

thank you

Don't send sheep to kill a wolf.

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blacktiger3915

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Sun Jul 13, 2008 3:15 am

blacktiger3915 says... · Sun Jul 13, 2008 3:15 am

thank you

Don't send sheep to kill a wolf.

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KBrowlingmeyerFAN

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Sun Jul 13, 2008 8:17 pm

KBrowlingmeyerFAN says... · Sun Jul 13, 2008 8:17 pm

OMFG!

This was so hysterical!

I'm laughing so hard, I think I'm crying... scratch that: I AM crying!

You are a genius! I love it when the stories are twisted and spun around differently. They give a whole new perspective on what people consider a happily ever after.

~Kiley

I'm Betting On Alice.

*Be*Ki*Al* 4EVER~<3

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LostInWonderland

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Mon Jul 14, 2008 2:45 am

LostInWonderland says... · Mon Jul 14, 2008 2:45 am

This was hysterical!!! There were some grammatical errors, but I loved the writing style. My friend is actually sitting next to me, and I told him he could choose which story to read. He chose this one and I'm glad because I still can't stop laughing. The funniest line was probably the one about how Charming now calls her Off White. I would have never thought of that! You did an awesome job!

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huggybear123

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Mon Jul 14, 2008 5:20 am

huggybear123 says... · Mon Jul 14, 2008 5:20 am

Wow! That was really messed up! This story was very funny, unpredictable, very demented, and pretty good. But what happens between Charming and Cinderella? Well, anyway, keep up the good (yet messed up) work!

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Curlyqpride

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Mon Jul 14, 2008 7:25 pm

Curlyqpride says... · Mon Jul 14, 2008 7:25 pm

OMG!!! I almost peed my pants in laughter! That was a good laugh!

Thanks for that! :lol:

Hello! I go by Curly!

I only give positive reviews because I don't like to give critism for some strange reason.

If you would like a little sunshine in your story, please PM me!

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blacktiger3915

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Mon Jul 28, 2008 1:54 pm

blacktiger3915 says... · Mon Jul 28, 2008 1:54 pm

You're welcome

Don't send sheep to kill a wolf.

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KailaMarie

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Mon Jul 28, 2008 2:33 pm

KailaMarie says... · Mon Jul 28, 2008 2:33 pm

“Who the fuck you yelling at?” he said in her face.

“I’m going to leave you.” Snow said seriously.

“And where are you going to go?”

“The same place were I have sex because I'm not gettin' any from you! You are fat. I don't want to have sex with a fat bitch! That is why I leave for some time, so I can fuck other princesses.”

im a little confused who's supposed to be talking when. the first one is Charming, and then Snow says I'm going to leave u, and then The Prince says where are you going to go? and then Snow says she has sex with other princesses?

im pretty sure you meant for Prince Charming to say that last bit. The way this is spaced or something is confusing.

but other than that, it was really origional, and an interesting idea. Very funny. Good job. =D

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