Giant Wolves/Elements Ch.3 part 3

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It was dark all around but Nami knew the way. She slid forward a couple more steps until she reached the candle that she had used so many times years ago. The candle was full of gathered dust but it was still usable. She then grabbed the rock and flint which she had saved in there and struck the candle with it and a spark flew and landed on the waxed string and flooding light everywhere. She could now see and stuffed the flint and stone into her pocket walked down the steep small steps. She carefully went down and saw some spider-webs and other small beetles but nothing to be afraid of. She continued down the dust caked stairs until she came to another small door.

The door was covered by large bushes on the outside and so was never seen by others. She unlatched the door and pushed it open after she had given it a kick for its hinges were a bit rusty. She then put out the candle and stuffed it into her pocket for she knew it wouldn’t be needed anymore. She slowly closed the door behind her and stayed hidden in the bushes, crouched silently. When she heard no one around she peeked a look and saw no one as well. Then she ran into the woods which were only a couple paces from her home. She looked around and saw no one had seen her and with a sigh of relief she continued on in the dense forest towards Goneck.

She saw him snoozing behind a tree and went towards him. She gently shook him awake. He blinked a couple times and then yawned before looking up at his awakener.

“Oh Nami. You’re finally out. I got worried when your father had dragged you in there. I thought you might not have found a way our, but I guess you have so shall we go?” he stood up and lead her through the forest. Being seen at this moment was Nami’s largest concern so they had to stay in hiding and the forest provided the best of it. When they were well away from the great white house Nami finally expressed her joy. A broad smile was plastered across her face and she couldn’t remove it. She skipped along at times and even hummed a few tunes. Suddenly Nami stopped. Goneck looked back when he had heard no footsteps and said, “What is it?”

“Thomas!”

“Who’s Thomas?”

“Thomas! He’s a friend of mine! How could I forget?” She hit herself on her forehead. “I had promised to go on a trip with him in a month. I must tell him that I cannot!” Goneck sighed and turned around.

“Where does he live?” he asked reluctantly.

“In the village.”

“Well I guess going it won’t be a complete waste of time for we can buy some supplies.” They were impossible to spot from the house now, even if they were out in the open so they separated from the forest and joined the road which would eventually take them to the village.

When they were walking the pebbled path Goneck muttered, “We should not talk here.” Nami nodded and they continued on in silence. A carriage with a rough looking heavy horse pulling it passed them on the way and stopped to ask them whether they needed a ride.

“Only if the dog is allowed as well.” The driver nodded and they boarded onto the carriage. She handed him the amount of money required for a ride to the village and they sat down. It was an open carriage and so it only consisted of seats with a canvas which shielded the occupant from the weather and also created privacy for it created three walls around it with only the view of what was in front of them. They rode along silently for awhile except for the whistling which came from the driver.

Then they heard multiple hoof beats hitting the pebbled road. Nami poked her head out the slightest bit and realized that they were her father’s men. She felt panicked and was without doubt sure that they would search inside the carriage. Nami tapped the driver and said, “Sir, I’m so sorry, but those men you hear coming behind you are here to get me. I need to hide from them! Please help me sir!” the driver looked back and saw the men coming closer and closer.

“You haven’t done anything bad have you?” he asked nervously

“Only if you consider running away from home because your father slapped you and make you do everything he tells you; bad.” The man looked shocked and stopped the carriage.

“Um… uh.” He looked around, hoping to find an idea and then it struck him. “Put the dog next to me and you hide underneath the carriage. There are three metal poles which support the carriage. You can hang upside down on there. They can support you weight and I will continue slowly on. Hurry!” Nami jumped off and crawled underneath the carriage and the driver picked up the dog and waited and when he heard no sound of scratching pebbles he continued on at a slow pace.

Then just as expected the four horsemen stopped along the carriage.

“S’cuse me Mr.” The driver looked them over before talking.

“Have you come to collect those damn debts again?” He growled. “How many times do I got to tell ya?! I’ll get them to you before the end of the damn week! And if you’d let me do my job maybe I could!” he scowled at them. The men were a bit taken aback at the gruff man but managed to sputter out what they had come to ask.

“Not debts sir, but a girl who might’ve been walking this path. Have you seen her?” Asked a buff looking man, he had a small trimmed mustache and long hair.

“Girl? No girl here.” He muttered.

“Well we need to search your carriage sir.” The driver shot them a look but nodded his head curtly as permission. The men dismounted and started searching.

When Nami heard that she started to panic, but it was the wrong thing to do for her arms started to strain and were trembling and about to fall. She tried her best to grip the bars tightly. Her palms were sweaty with sweat and were slipping. With a last effort she swung her arms around the bars and gripped them with her elbows. Finally she could hang on. But the carriage had shook when she had done so. The driver noticed it and quickly said something.

“Damn bolts, always popping and making the carriage shudder.” The men looked at the man uncertainly and took one last quick look at the carriage before re mounting the horses.

“Good day sir.” Said the long haired man. The driver just grumbled. They soon sped off with a clatter of hooves. Nami finally let herself drop to the ground with an exhausted sigh of relief. She then dragged herself out from under the carriage.

“You ok there?” Asked the driver.

“Yeah.” She clambered unto her knees. “Thanks.” Then boarded the carriage once more. Goneck when back and sat next to her and they headed to the village.

Nami paid the driver extra for his help and they were dropped off in front of Thomas’s two story home. Nami guessed that the bottom was used as the bakery and the top was where they lived. There was a wooden sign hanging from the door with the picture of steaming break with a hot oven on it. She walked up to it and hesitated before giving the door three hollow knocks. She waited for a couple seconds before a tall women opened the door while washing her hands on a hand towel.

“Hello!” she smiled. Goneck waited outside and she showed Nami into the spacey room and brought her to the counter. “Well what can I do for you today? Would you like some dinner rolls? Sweet bread perhaps?” She looked at her expectantly. In front of Nami were rows and rows of hot steaming bread of all sizes and color. They looked tempting but Nami knew that she had to do what she had come to do first.

“Actually I came for a different reason.” Nami said. The woman’s expression changed to surprise and then to curiosity.

“Yes?”

“I’m a friend of Thomas’s and I needed to talk to him.”

“Oh I see.” She looked thoughtful for awhile while looking Nami over. “Ok I’ll go get him for you, you can sit right there.” She said, pointing to a wooden chair. Nami did as she was told and seconds later Thomas walked down from a flight of stairs.

“Nami!” He said with surprise when he saw her. She smiled and stood up. “Have you come to tell me that you’re coming?” he beamed. Nami felt so bad for being the one to disappoint him.

“I’m sorry Thomas, but I don’t think I can.” Thomas’s smile literally fell.

“Why? Is it your father? Do you not want to go?”

“No no!” Nami said shaking her head. “Of course I wanted to go! I would’ve loved spending a whole month with you in Rovenhold on business, selling bread! There’s nothing more I would’ve loved to do in the world!”

“Would’ve?” he asked, with a permanent frown etched unto his usually handsome face.

“Well, it’s just that something has come up. Something I must attend to.” She looked into his disappointed face and said, “I’m sorry.” He looked at her and tried to change his face into a smile and successfully did although it was just a feeble smile it was a smile nonetheless.

She turned around to leave and she heard him shout, “I’ll wait for you to come back!”

“I’d rather you didn’t!” She yelled back while chuckling nervously. She left the house and joined Goneck. They walked towards the village square. There they had rows and rows of village people selling supplies. Many of them were snoozing as they were selling things and ended up getting stolen from by small children but it seemed like neighbors looked after neighbors for many of the children got caught. Not a lot of people were buying things at this time but there were a couple other people looking around. Nami did the same and bought some more food along with thin rope and another warmer blanket. She put her food into one of the pockets and the rope in the main one and the blanket was rolled and latched unto the top of the bag. They soon found the rode which would lead to Rovenhold and they followed it until they came out of Stronghold, seeing a sign which said, “City of Stronghold”.

Finally they were on the road to their first destination which was Rovenhold. Goneck said that they had an old friend there that was an ally of the Mirgten and he promised that he would go visit him when they found a promising candidate.

“So… who is it that we’re, er, going to go and meet?” inquired Nami hesitantly. Talking to an animal still seemed a bit awkward even after their first conversation.

“As I said, it’s an ally of the Mirgten. They have known each other for a long time. He’s helped us every since he knew the difference between good and bad when he was a young boy.”

“What’s his name though?” Nami persisted.

“You’ll see. It’s a surprise.” Goneck said smugly. Nami hated being kept in the dark, but sealed her mouth shut not knowing whether it was rude or not to press matters.

Nami started wondering about Goneck’s background. He hadn’t said much about him specifically and seeing that they would be traveling together for a while she thought that she should know.

“So, what about you?” Nami asked.

“What about me?” Goneck wondered.

“Like, your family, your history. Anything along those lines.”

“Oh, well my sire is Duketup, and my dam is Shandalir. They’re both back at the caves. I was their only son.” He said. “And my father is the brother of Brothfear, our pack alpha.”

“Is that it?” Nami asked, wondering if there was anything else that was of importance in his life.

“Mostly.” Goneck replied quickly. He didn’t say anything so she went on to another subject.

“What is our plan for our journey?” Nami finally asked.

“Well, right now we’re heading to Rovenhold. Then we will have to visit to every single other city in Saradana.”

Every single city in Saradana? How is that going to be possible?! I thought that this was going to be a simple trip to his tribe, and then…The enormity of the forthcoming task hadn’t struck her until then. She hadn’t thought about what was going to happen after leaving her own homw and how she was going to persuade everyone. She wasn’t good with words, and she had a hard time persuading even her dad. How she was going to do this she had no idea. What have I gotten myself into just now? The idea was overwhelming, the very thought of it had not registered in her mind before. She pushed that thought away for now for at the moment she had other things to ponder about.

Nami looked ahead at the road then looked at Goneck again and asked, “What is it that we have to do in every city in Saradana?”

“We must meet the other allies. We need more than just one human.” Goneck looked up at Nami. “We had allies placed in all the cities. They call themselves the Circle for they hold us together with the humans. They are good friends and have been very helpful. We trust them a lot and you should too.” Goneck said.

“And so we’re going to go and meet The Circle and then go to your pack?”
“That’s pretty much the plan.”

“What are all these people going to do to help us, and are you going to be the only one from your pack that is going to travel with me?”

“These allies are going to help you. They are going to teach you our history, our knowledge, and basic combat skills.” He stopped to scratch his ear before continuing and walking. “For your second question, you are going to meet one more of my kin before you meet all of them. He is young, but you shouldn’t take that into account for his teaching capabilities. He is going to do some pre-training with you and he is going to help us if we find any conflict on our journey. He is extremely intelligent and he will help us complete this journey in ample time, as well as be one of your teachers as well. One skill that he will teach you will be the sixth sense.” Goneck saw that Nami had doubt in her eyes when he mentioned the 6th sense. “Everyone has a 6th sense. Humans rarely use it and therefore most people believe that they don’t have it. It has been ignored for so long it is buried deep inside their senses. You’ll see.”

In her doubtful silence Nami looked at the landscape surrounding them. Her travels around Saradana had been limited the routes between her regular home and her summer home along with regular visits to her other relatives, and she had only visited Rovenhold once. The landscape was flat and the horizon looked like it would never end. As if you could run and run and you would never reach the end of it. There was sparse vegetation except for the few surrounding trees that grew in sections. The ground was a tan brown like the color of the inside of a potato. The only animals that existed in this land were rabbits, mice, and a few other small creatures that could live off the meager amount of food.

Goneck padded alongside her in silence. The fate of his kin rests on the shoulders of one so young. I wonder how he can take the pressure, Nami pondered.

Soon they met their first traveler. He was small and young. He looked worn and miserable; he had raggedy looking clothes that were of loose fit and his shoes were worn down to the soles to the extent of where you could see the pink of his toes. He looked around, he looked at them for a second and with a flit of his eyes, he collapsed.
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“Thomas! He’s a friend of mine! How could I forget?” She hit herself on her forehead. “I had promised to go on a trip with him in a month. I must tell him that I cannot!” Goneck sighed and turned around.

“Where does he live?” he asked reluctantly.

“In the village.”

“Well I guess going it won’t be a complete waste of time for we can buy some supplies.” They were impossible to spot from the house now, even if they were out in the open so they separated from the forest and joined the road which would eventually take them to the village


Instead of this, have Nami remember and say "we need to drop by the village for a little while." Let us into her head more. We need to know what she is thinking and feeling. Otherwise it sounds like cold observation:(

“Only if you consider running away from home because your father slapped you and make you do everything he tells you; bad.” The man looked shocked and stopped the carriage.

Ugh. This is too whiny. This is pointing fingers at her father, and it sounds really, really bad. The man probably would probably be less shocked, considering the time period they're in. He might think of it as discipline and a whiny sixteen year old not being able to handle it. She sounds a lot younger than sixteen by the way. She acts younger, like she's twelve or thirteen.

“Um… uh.” He looked around, hoping to find an idea and then it struck him. “Put the dog next to me and you hide underneath the carriage. There are three metal poles which support the carriage. You can hang upside down on there. They can support you weight and I will continue slowly on. Hurry!” Nami jumped off and crawled underneath the carriage and the driver picked up the dog and waited and when he heard no sound of scratching pebbles he continued on at a slow pace.

Okay. This is WAY too conveniant. Her best bet would be to run back into the woods. Also, there is NO way that those guards can't see her. If she's hanging from these poles, her body is still showing. Unless the walls of this carriage go all the way to the ground, which I doubt. :)

Nami paid the driver extra for his help and they were dropped off in front of Thomas’s two story home. Nami guessed that the bottom was used as the bakery and the top was where they lived. There was a wooden sign hanging from the door with the picture of steaming break with a hot oven on it. She walked up to it and hesitated before giving the door three hollow knocks. She waited for a couple seconds before a tall women opened the door while washing her hands on a hand towel

It sounds like she's been here before, with the way her father rants. Why does she 'guess' it's a bakery??

The dialogue between Thomas and Nami don't show very much emotion. You're telling us what they feel instead of showing us.

“No no!” Nami said shaking her head. “Of course I wanted to go! I would’ve loved spending a whole month with you in Rovenhold on business, selling bread! There’s nothing more I would’ve loved to do in the world!”

Okay, THIS ^^^^^^^^^ is a good reason for her father to be angry. Spending a MONTH alone with a boy I assume is the same age as her? I'm surprised Tom wasn't murdered in his sleep. ^-^" AND it seems she has done this before. That would DEFINITELY make her father angry. -.-"

“Oh, well my sire is Duketup, and my dam is Shandalir. They’re both back at the caves. I was their only son.” He said. “And my father is the brother of Brothfear, our pack alpha.”

I don't know what this little guy is exactly, but his parents would not be a 'sire' and 'dam.' Since he is a wolf, his father would be a 'dog' his mother a 'bitch.' These are the correct terms. I would not write the latter otherwise. If he is a fox, the mother would be a 'vixen.'

“We must meet the other allies. We need more than just one human.” Goneck looked up at Nami. “We had allies placed in all the cities. They call themselves the Circle for they hold us together with the humans. They are good friends and have been very helpful. We trust them a lot and you should too.” Goneck said.


'The Circle' is too generic. I suggest you come up with a more creative way to state your idea. This is also a good reason she should have taken a horse ^-^V

Well, you sort of lost me towards the end. Too much dialogue, paragraphs are still too big :) Keep going though. I'm curious about what is going to happen. :D :D:D
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