Young Writer's Dream

*Content deleted*

When sea-serpent rises, when wild siren calls,
We've only to write, and invent what befalls.

This first line here is odd? I think maybe you should change it to, "When sea-serpents rise, when the wild siren calls" otherwise it sounds kind off weird?

To write is our purpose. [make this a comma] Creation our theme.
A young writer's passion- [you can make this an EM-dash by hitting ALT+0151. it looks like this: — ] A young writer's dream.

I really liked this! They rhyme and rhythm was awesome, and this made me smile a lot. I'm not really sure what you can change, it's simplicity made it work. It wasn't amazing or anything, but I like it as is.

O_O I just got a little chill. The words were seamless, I mean they just went in and out and it never chopped up or anything. I really think this is brilliant, great job.

This reminds me of the YWS Storybook: "YWS: The Gathering"

If the story stops, all the authors die...

I love the imagery you incorporated in this, it kind of made me dreamy.

Nice! GREAT job with the rhyme and rhythm. I liked how this seemed kind of old fashioned, and I liked the imagery.

So, no complaints, really. It's not exactly new and earthshattering or anything, but it's a good read!

Kudos! ^_^

I like this. You have a lovely writing style. You had a good rhythm here and your rhyming was great. You related this very well, and your development was execellent. I'm not sure about "The gurgle and thunder and crash of the sea" though. There seems to be one adjective too many, and I'm not sure it's really a sentence in its own right, as it can't stand alone. I'd try taking another look at it.
Other than that, this was a lovely piece.

This was amazing.

You have a good rhyhm to the poem, the rhyming was great too. You also use interesting words to describe things which keeps me interested. Yep.

Basically, good work
.

x

This is so beautiful...as a writer I feel the same way. What made this poem perfect was the rhyming it was synchronized...perfect...great job!!!

I'm not really into poems, but I was looking through here and saw this, and I loved it!!

To stop writing stories, consider the cost!
A whole other kingdom, forgotten and lost!

This was probably my favorite line, because it is so true. If we stop writing, we kill the story basically, and the characters with it. I can't give you anything helpful, really, though, because I'm not a big poem person. But this one was inspiring!