Broken Heart

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What do you do for a broken heart?
You know how they say fix it.
What do you do when it's already been broken?
What do you do when a soul has lost its way?
What do you do when a soul has been lost so many times,
That you don't even know where you’re going,
When you can't even see.
What do you do when you're walking alone?
And the only thing beside you is your shadow.
When you wish someone out there would find you.
What do you do for a heart that has been broken one too many times?




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Hey! Good concept for a poem! I especially like the last line, and wish the rest of the poem were more like it. You need to work on your punctuation though. There were errant periods everywhere! Periods especially, where there should just be commas or even question marks. Also, this idea has been used. It's always a good rule of thumb to try and write something brand new. :)




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It was too repetitive for me to like. It was just sort of bland--all questions and no answers. You really have to go deeper than that to make a good poem. Express feelings, so that the reader can feel with you. But this is how I like poetry. ^_~ Since it is your first poem, I suggest you read more poetry and get the hang of what you are trying to write before writing it, you know? Also, I have a copy of The Idiot's Guide to Writing Poetry and it's wonderful. You might consider getting a copy or seeing if there is one at your local library. It's good for beginners and older poets alike, it's already helped me out a whole lot.

Best of luck!
“It's necessary to have wished for death in order to know how good it is to live.”
― Alexandre Dumas, The Count of Monte Cristo




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It has anice idea, but i would think it would give a little insight into how to solve the problem. You've just riddled us with questions with no real conclusion to be drawn other than "huh?"

It didn't seem to hold much ump either, some differnet word usuage would be helpful.
"Maybe Senpai ate Yuka-tan's last bon-bon?"
----Stupei, Ace Defective




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What do you do when you're walking alone?
And the only thing beside you is your shadow.
When you wish someone out there would find you.


These lines reminded me of that Green Day song; Boulevard of Broken Dreams.

Your poem is alright, but it could be something greater if it had more depth to it. Right now it's just a series of questions without answers. Try elaborating on your ideas more.

Also, your second line didn't read very well to me. I think I question mark might help it.



i don't need to search the stars to know myself
— soundofmind