Unknown Story Chap.11 part 2

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Like I siad, I'm gonna stop posting these. This is the last one... Mainly because no one reads them and it feels like I'm just clogging up the forum. Okay, this isn't the end of the story but I'm done posting them...

~*~*~


Knall opened his eyes slowly. His room was completely dark, the sun being blocked out by the thick curtains set over his windows. Knall lay in the darkness, listening to a distant bird chirping in the distance. He closed his eyes and concentrated harder. He heard water, running smoothing across the grassy plains. He heard far away trees rustling in the wind.

A leaf hit the ground. Now he focused harder, and inside the tower. He heard the clatter of footsteps, a hushed conversation. At first all he could make out were hushed whispers, then… Words. But it was in the human language. “.” Knall whispered to himself. The conversation eventually began to be translated into Shade.

Knall sat up, as if hoping if he was closer the conversation would become clearer. He began to make out the words, it seemed like it was Rezlel and Myvel talking. He leaned in closer and the words began to come, “…sloppy. We can’t afford to make anymore mistakes such as this.” Rezlel whispered, harshly.

“Maybe we tell him. You never know, he might go for it.” Rezlel snorted and replied, “You know Derez. He would never do it willingly, and he seems to be taking an interest in the Shade.”

“Knall? Do you think he suspects something?”

“I don’t think so. He is gone most of the time. Although his time to train the Shade is coming soon. You have to stall him as long as possible. Nice job with the book, though.”

“That wasn’t my fault. I didn’t even know we had that book here. I thought it was destroyed a long time ago. I thought that evil could never be reborn again. I suppose it was lucky that I did have it though.”

“Just continue to hold him up as long as possible. He’ll be sending someone soon to take care of him.”

“It’s almost sad to see him go. He had such an open mind.”

“It is not yet over. You continue your job and I’ll continue mine. And if you tell anyone, Myvel. I’ll know about it.” Knall could hear Myvel swallow and Rezlel slowly walked away. Then he heard Myvel slowly walk away.

Knall slowly got out of bed. One, because he was still aching from the incident with the book. And two, in shock of what he had just heard. Rezlel and Myvel are planning something. Gotta tell Derez. But where is he? Knall limped into the main room and sat at one of the couches. Knall closed his eyes and focused. “.” Which was casting for, Derez. The word spread throughout the tower like a wave. Covering each floor and contacting each living being.

“No!” Knall had wanted the spell to contact only Derez. But now Myvel and Rezlel were going to here it as well. Knall hurriedly staggered into his bedroom and hid underneath the bed. He closed his eyes and there was silence. Only the sound of his harsh breathing.

The door to his room slowly burst open and Knall saw a pair of boots enter. They stopped and stood for a second. Then they quickly walked over to the bed. The bed drifted away and Derez came into view.

“Yes!” Knall quickly stood and grasped Derez by the shoulders. “Derez, Rezlel and Myvel are planning something. I don’t know what it is bu-“ Derez cut him off by putting his finger up to his mouth and diverting his eyes towards the door.

“They’re coming. Thank you Knall but I already know. When they get here, act like you’re in pain. I’ll handle the rest.” Knall looked dumbfounded and lay in his bed that was put back into place. “I’ll come by later to discuss it.” Knall nodded and closed his eyes, faking agony. He started squirming and groaning.

The door burst open and Myvel and Rezlel rushed in. Derez cast a healing charm on Knall and Rezlel shouted, “What’s going on?!”

“Knall called to me, he’s in pain. I can handle it.” Rezlel nodded and he left. Myvel followed, glancing back at them. The door rematerialized and Derez stopped to listen for a moment. “They’re gone. I must stay here for a moment.” Derez stood and cast another healing charm.

“They may be able to sense when magic is cast. I might not be able to be the first one here again. Please refrain from using any suspicious magic. I will be here tonight at two o’clock.” Derez left and Knall lay back. It all happened so fast. At first Knall had to think of what to do but then realized the only thing he could do was wait.

He climbed out of bed and went into the kitchen. Attempting to erase the events that had previously transpired, he fixed himself a sandwich and read a book for most of the day. In anticipation of their meeting, Knall gazed out the window, watching the sun sink into the distant horizon.

Soon the sky was dark and full of stars. They winked down on Knall and he gazed into the vast expanse of light. This calmed Knall, at least so he was no longer worried about what was going on at the moment. This thought did bring him back to the issue at hand. “I wonder what they are planning. And what Derez is going to do about it.” Knall whispered to himself.

Knall craned his neck around and caught a glimpse of the clock. It was time, but Derez was not yet here. Knall stared back at the stars and closed his eyes. Now everything was dark. His troubles floating away… silently…

Knall heard the door burst into fragments and stood. Derez quickly came in and said, “Come.” He went into the bedroom and Knall followed closely. The door closed behind them and Derez cast something. Knall didn’t know what it was but recognized most of the meanings.

“That’ll keep away prying ears. Now, sit.” Knall walked past Derez and sat on the bed. “Now, ask you’re questions.” Knall took a deep breath and replied.

“What are Rezlel and Myvel planning?” Derez stepped back to lean against the bookcase.

“Rezlel and Myvel have been talking about this ‘plan’ for several years. I have only found a few details of what they are planning exactly. For one, I know that they are reporting to someone. I haven’t the faintest clue as to who it may be but I am afraid it is someone with great power.

“In order to carry out their instructions they need two very important people. I have been searching for them for a very long time. The first, is quite surprisingly, you. Which I think is interesting, mainly because Rezlel is the one who brought you here; doubtless he had no idea who you were when he did so.

“I do not know what they intend to do with you and this other person but it cannot be good. Another requirement they must meet is gathering all of The Four Great Wizards. There is Myvel, the Fourth, Rezlel, the Third, and I the First. I am afraid the Second has been dead for a very long time. If I had a map with me now I could show you were he died. Are you familiar with The Wound of the Earth?” Knall nodded and Derez continued,

“In his death, Kynth caused the gapping maw now known as The Wound of the Earth.”

“How… Exactly did, Kynth die?” Asked Knall, curious. Derez stopped to close his eyes, inhaling deeply.

“A very long time ago, nearly seven to eight hundred years ago, there was a great evil rising in the north. No one has ever explored there since. Any unfortunate traveler who attempts to brave the mountains is never seen again. The Selsean Mountains are the last markings on any map. The rest is unexplored and dangerous.

“There used to be thousands of cities and villages there. Until this creature, I will not dare to mutter her name for even that it filled with power… Dark power. It is strange… Most people cannot truly understand the meaning of a name until they understand the meaning of the thing or person. Names title something, describe it. Therefore, if even the name is terrible, won’t the thing itself be even more frightening… more powerful… Evil…” Derez seemed to stare into space and suddenly became unfocused.

“Derez?” At the sound of his name he snapped up and said,

“Yes? Oh, of course. I’m sorry. This, thing… She killed everything. She destroyed everything. I realize it must be hard for you to understand. Just imagine, thousands of lives, all lay out before you. Then, you simply wipe them away. Suddenly gone. No longer there, dead. While I and the rest of The Four discussed what we should and can do about this, Kynth went out to stop it himself.

“The rest of us realized only too late that only our power combined would be able to stop this menace. A great battle ensued. Kynth and she battle for hours, never resting. Kynth was the most powerful of The Four but was almost no match for her. Her power was terrible and great. Kynth sacrificed himself to stop her. The Wound of the Earth… A reminder of the sacrifice of Kynth. It happened so long ago, and was so terrible that no book could keep its contents for long. All books were either destroyed or forgotten.” Derez stopped there and said, “We can talk more about this later if you wish but it is late and I believe it is time for me to go.”

Knall nodded and watched him leave. He stood and rubbed his face. Knall turned and glanced out the window, gazing at the white stars. He climbed into bed and lay there, processing the information he had just learned. With answers come even more questions. Knall closed his eyes and fell asleep.
I used to rule the world, see it rise when I gave the word, now in the morning I sleep alone, sweep the streets I used to own

-Coldplay, Viva La Viva




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I know I'm coming in at a great moment and, since I haven't read any of the rest, I have no idea what is happening. I just wanted to point out one thing, though, which may or may not be helpful.

A leaf hit the ground. Now he focused harder, and inside the tower. He heard the clatter of footsteps, a hushed conversation. At first all he could make out were hushed whispers, then… Words. But it was in the human language. “.” Knall whispered to himself. The conversation eventually began to be translated into Shade.


That word he whispers to himself, whatever it is? I can't read it. It just looks like a bunch of squares to me. Maybe it's the fact that I'm on a mac, or whatever, but I thought you ought to know anyway.

Cheers!
Ubi caritas est vera, Deus ibi est.

"The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly." ~ Richard Bach

Moth and Myth <- My comic! :D




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RRRAAAHHH!!!!!! *Rips out hair* Okay... I've siad this so *Whimpers* many times. The squares on my PC when I first typed it were these cools symbols I used for Casting. When I transfered it it just turned into squares... Sorry but, theres not much I can do...

~Pol~
I used to rule the world, see it rise when I gave the word, now in the morning I sleep alone, sweep the streets I used to own

-Coldplay, Viva La Viva




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DUDE! NOOOOOO!!!

Don't stop! *whimpers* :P

That would be like a sign, you're giving up! I mean, I can crit if you want, but I've already read it...

Anyway, why isn't your sister critting this? What kind of a sister is she, anyway? :wink:

This is good! Not a lot of mistakes here, and it's getting intriguing. I like the part at the end when he thinks: "with answers comes even more questions" So true and very nicely phrased. A neat sentence, that.

So if you decide to continue posting these, just pm me whenever you get a new one up and I'll crit on it! (heh heh...my alterior motives being that I could use the posts *rubs hands and cackles in glee*)

~You Know Who (Many-Named-One of Insanity.) 8)
"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."
~Albert Einstein




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I'm back and my keyboard is smoking! Okay, here we go...

First
Knall lay in the darkness, listening to a distant bird chirping in the distance.

Get rid of one of the "distant"s. We get the point with only one.

At first Knall had to think of what to do but then realized the only thing he could do was wait.

How about this instead, At first Knall was trying to think of what to do but then realized the only thing he could do was to wait. I think it would be clearer.

SWEET! More information...but you still left me wondering. What's going to happen! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

*Runs off to read next section*

-GJ
the greenjay strikes again...




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I like the added conflict in this chapter and I'm glad you decided to keep posting your story. Here's the usual list of suggestions -

But now Myvel and Rezlel were going to [s]here[/s] hear it as well.

“Now, ask [s]you’re[/s] your questions.”

If I had a map with me now I could show you where he died.

“In his death, Kynth caused the [s]gapping[/s] gaping maw now known as The Wound of the Earth.”

Until this creature, I will not dare to mutter her name for even that [s]it[/s] is filled with power… Dark power.

“Derez?” At the sound of his name he snapped [s]up[/s] out of the trance/ out of his thoughts and said,

While I and the rest of The Four discussed what we should and [s]can[/s] could do about this, Kynth went out to stop it himself.

Kynth and she battled for hours, never resting.

Overall, I liked this chapter and I'm glad to see a female villain, even if she is a past villain. It adds some necessary diversion to the book and I'm looking forward to the time when Khor and Knall cross paths again.
Writing Gooder

~Previously KittyKatSparklesExplosion15~

The light shines brightest in the darkest places.



I feel like if I was the mafia I’d leave a voicemail.
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