MoonMagic..Chap.1

I like it very much, You have a great story coming here.

however, there is one thing i should say:

quote:
His reflection was what he looked at. Long silver hair flowed down his back and dark purple eyes contrasted against his moon colored skin. All his features were graceful like all the elves that he knew. Alberic sat there until the sun completely set. Then he knew it was time.
unquote

I'm sorry, but it drives me insane when someone uses a mirror or some reflection to describe their character. do you look in a mirror and describe every feature to yourself?

Other than that you had a few typo areas, but i'm not really worried about those. I really like the beginging, though! I'm excited to see what else will come!

wow this is really good i only have a few remmarks

"Stress, Why is there stress bothring my rider?"

you didnt spell bothering wright

However we will be the target for the first time.

you might want to rewright it or put in some commas or something

leaped on the mere's

you spelt mare wrong

Alberic was still trotting along through the field when he realized the sun was setting and he needed to make a camp. So, he got off his gray mare and led her to the river they had been following for the past hour. He took off his small pack and laid it on the ground, and then he squatted beside the river.

on this part dont use the word HE so mush, its repetative you could write Alberic was still trotting along through the field when he realized the sun was setting and needed to make a camp. or something else, just not so many he's

14 seeds he counted

actually wright out the number

Them hr pulled out a flute and played a magical song

you might want to rewwright this sentance say like "He then pulled out a flute and played a song that wove magic into the air" or something more visible, plus you spelt then an he

it is looking relllllllllyyyyy good i hope you keep wrighting, seriously, i love reading your work!

I think the whole in media res thing can be used well, to throw us right into the action and explain things as we go. There's an art to it, and I'm not sure you've quite got it. If you plan to do that, you might try starting with them already on their way, even in the middle of some sort of obstacle (a minor skirmish with the enemy, perhaps). This makes the reader feel as though we're supposed to be starting with a bang, as opposed to just falling from the sky into the middle of something.
Also, don't start with description if you're trying to make an action scene. Describe him in short bits. If you're writing action, keep the sentences short.

This flows over into when you introduce his looks. It's okay for some description to be intertwined with the action. His hair is long, so you might mention it getting tangled in a tree branch as rides by.

My biggest peeves were the clichés. Cliché can be good; it's a helpful starting point. You don't seem to have done anything spectacular with the clichés you've chosen to work with, however. The horse's name (Moon Streak) just makes me cringe. It's like The fantasy horse name, with a capital T. (I am guilty of having similarly named horses in my own past work, which is why it bothers me so much.)
Next, his eyes. Something about purple eyes just sets me (and others) off. Again, they're like The stock fantasy thing, in this case, eye color. Human beings don't naturally have purple eyes, so in fantasy, it seems like they show up a lot to denote "specialness" or, at least, "otherness."

The next bit I want to mention is scene breakers. "OK" is a scene breaker, because it doesn't fit into what little you've told us about the universe. This seems so far like a pseudo-Medieval fantasy, which is all well and good, but "OK" does not fit into that setting.
Another thing is the measurements of the hut in feet. First, they're not period appropriate (or maybe they are?) but you don't need to give us the numbers. Just saying it was spacious is enough.

Oh, and another bit about the hut: it presents a fascinating opportunity for you to make your elvin race something different than the stock fantasy things they (elfs/elves in general) usually are. Here's someone who is (literally) so in tune with nature he can make trees grow, but he feels the need to change his surroundings to suit him. That's two conflicting things: usually, those in tune with nature (elves, &c.) don't change it, they make do with the natural environment, but your elf just changed nature to suit him, which is usually the hallmark of the stock fantasy bad guy, or at least, misguided human being. I'll be curious to see where that goes.

One last bit is on the bonding ceremony. Make sure that we get that information in the story itself. It's very important that readers get this stuff not in footnotes, but in context.
Also, why are they so late in life? One would think that they'd learn to ride at a much younger age. If you're going through all of the trouble of learning to ride, and then breaking a horse for the bonding thing, why not do it in one go? Is there a reason horse & rider wouldn't be born at the same time, or something?

Finally (for real this time), I (like everyone else) noticed a lot of typos. If you want to (and don't feel like you must), please feel free to drop me a line if you want me to go over your stories for grammatical errors before you post them here. I might not always have time, but I'll let you know, and I'd be glad to help if you want me to.