Obviously, I would reach over and slowly dismember your pathetic little insect body and revel in the panicked screams you gave as I popped your little head off.
So, what would you say if you found yourself in the OED?
"If I have not seen as far as others, it is because giants were standing on my shoulders." -Hal Abelson
Surround yourself with people who are serious about being writers, and who will tell you, ‘Hey—you can do better than this.’ Who will be critical of your work, but also supportive. And who will not be competitive in a negative way. — Isabel Quintero