Eat Your Mushrooms!

Eat your mushrooms, eat your mushrooms!
However alien-seeming they be!
For their caps are filled with flamingos
And the stems are full of tea!

Eat your mushrooms, eat your mushrooms!
They chuckle and sing and dance –
Broccoli and lettuce don’t care-
More then any other vegetable you could chance!

Mushrooms, mushrooms, all wriggling!
So good for you and all happy,
Their charming lyrics and pastry tarts-
All dipped in milky tea!

Spotted and striped, ye mushrooms
Sour and bitter and sweet
They speak in Japanese and English-
But never ROFLOFL or 1337.

Mushrooms, all mushrooms,
Cousin of strawberries fair;
Bearers of strange and bizarre tidings
And setters of fashion’s flair.

Alas, poor mushroom, now is your timely end;
You’re in a pot of vegetables so pungent
Poor fungus, we loved you;
And we toast to your flavors lent!

____________
This is why Sumi should not be bored.

EVER.

I can't exactly say it was good. It was a rambly poem about mushrooms. I can't even write it a good critique... at least it rhymed well enough?

It was overly random, and gave me no feeling beyond "wtf?" so it doesn't exactly make a good poem but I suppose if you are bored, it is fun to write, but: You shouldn't post something if you aren't serious about the piece. Why should I waste my time critiquing something you don't care about?

Not to say you don't care about this, just my general assumption. (Assumptions are never very good.)

It's actually a sort of preface on a flashfic I thought of earlier.
(Yes, the flash fic is about mushrooms. Someone finding out about them LOL.)

This is to find out general reaction

(Does this have to do with the "BADGER BADGER BADGER" thing? Probably. )

In a way, it's my own tribute to Douglas Adams. Yesterday was national towel day, and I felt...honorbound. XD

Thanks, Claudette.

Sigh, Sumi, you shouldn't be bored

umm, I'm not sure what to say. My general reaction was that it should be a song in a movie (preferably sung by oompa-loompas). Other than that, I don't really see a point to it. Though, that probably was the point in the first place.

I thought it was funny!

...Or does that just make me weird?

Very... random. The rhythm was...interesting, to say the least.

Maybe it would be better as a flashfic- it may make more sense, or failing that, get stuck in people's heads (like that annoying PO-TA-TOES flashfic on albino blacksheep) and cause a few giggles.

And as far as I could see, it was never intended to take seriously anyway lol

Oompa-Loompas! Of course! Why didn't I think of that? xD right after Charlie makes the flamingo-filled mushroom treats.

Wait...wait...loop!

This poem has no point = but that IS the point = so the poem with no point is the point?



I is so confused. XD

to nuttychooky:
No, it just means you have a random sense of humor. Like me! xD

Yeah, you weren't supposed to "go delve into the meaning" or anything, just for giggles.

I giggle at stanza 3 every time i see it.......XD

Thanks for reviewing, all!

~Sumi

I thought that this excerpt was the best bit by far!

"Eat your mushrooms, eat your mushrooms!
However alien-seeming they be!
For their caps are filled with flamingos
And the stems are full of tea! "

Oh, it was so silly, and it has that childish/"we're all mad here" feel to it.
Have you read anything by Lewis Carrol? Alice in Wonderland or Through the Looking-Glass?

Wow... a psychedelic poem about mushrooms. Who would have thought?

It was a lovely nonsense poem. You should be bored more often.

Small nitpics:

And the [should be their] stems are full of tea!

And we toast to your flavors [should be flavor's] lent!

Next time when constructing a nonsense poem, be a little more careful on how its rhythm goes. There are some places throughout the poem where there are too many words to really make it smooth to say out loud, and nonsense poems really should be said out loud.

Haha, thanks guys! ^_^

Yes, I've read both Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass.

Carroll is like....Douglas Adams' fantasy-obsessed grandfather, or something I read the annotated versions, and ye gods, there were PAAAAAAAAAAAAAGES of notes on that....took me a while to muddle through it all

It was a lovely nonsense poem. You should be bored more often.

Haha, thanks, Snoink. The bored bit I don't hear too often...mostly people just stare at me then back away...xD

And yes, I'm totally mad. XD
Don't you forget it! XD

Thanks for reviewing!
'Tis a pleasure to be 'tiqued by the great Snoink-as-so-mentioned-on-the-front-page.


~Sumi
P.S.

EAT YOUR MUSHROOMS!

:giggles insanely:

EDIT: Yes, Snoink, I am in total agreement; nonsense poems -especially ones about mushrooms- deserve to be read aloud.

this was good. really good. i can honestly say i can imagine my mom singing this for me at the kitchen table. it made me ROFL. and the rythmn made me want to jump up and start doing a funny folk dance. i really liked it... thanks for the short cheer up

xjessi

Mmm. Okay. Mushrooms are apparently very diverse.

It was random, kind of random to a point past "funny" and onto "uh, whaa?" and I can't say that's truly a good thing? I suppose if you were just bored one day it works for a poem, but I don't think it will get very far in the publishing world and such.

Happy Editing
WM

I'm not really sure what i think of this poem. I wasn't bad but it wasn't great. Sorry to seem harsh, but its the reality. You ramble about mushrooms? But hey just like with my own work u have ur own style, which i totally respect. try making it a little more adventurous however little u maybe talking about

I did love it y'all