The Black Cobra: Chapter 1

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Thank you so much Amelia, I love getting detailed crits because when I re-read the chapter so many times I start missing some important things.

I'm starting to notice I describe things unnecessarily, and it's starting to bug me. I'll have to fix that as I keep writing.




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I'm curious to see how this works out. Please update soon. You have a good sense of diction and I like that.
"Anyone can where a mask but the importance of everyone around them is to see the person beneath the mask, underneath the skin and into the heart."



Excuse me I have never *lied* about a character I just don't tell the truth
— AceassinOfTheMoon