Funny Rules

Elizabeth · 2005-02-27T05:19:08Z

Me and SAm on this club made these up please don't take them unless you ask. Rule #1 at the White House: If you are sensitive to your children viewing partial nudity, do not take them to the White House. The lawnmower guys usually take off their shirts in front of the fence (where the tourists are supposed to stand). I am not sure whether or not this is supposed to be a tourist attraction in itself, or what. Rule #2 when at Williamsburg: Do not stare at the cute guys running down the street from William and Rule Mary’s. Even more important, do not feel sorry for them when they get run over by a carriage. Rule #3 when at the capital: Do not stand directly in front of the Hawaiian statue. You will understand this better when you're in a coma 5 floors below after crashing through the floor. Rule #4 when at the National Air and Space Museum: When at McDonald's, you must run if you want ketchup. It is the most popular museum in America, and as such, the ketchup runs out really fast. Rule #5 when in Antarctica: When you are traveling to frozen Tundra be sure to bring mittens and not to tease the penguins. They know how to swim in -32F water and you don't. It goes the same with Polar Bears only they will chase you around and make you wish you were in -32F water. Rule #6 in an airport It may be possible to take drastic measures to get through security quickly, smoothly, and as quietly as possible. Removal of: shirts, skirts, jeans, boots, high-heels, loafers, tennis-shoes, necklaces, earrings, nose-rings, tongue-rings and tongue, Rolex watch, flashlight, eye brows, wigs, packaged bacon, Michael Jordan, feet, eyeballs, left pinky toe, right index finger, cherry bombs, fire-crackers, salt crackers, cheese graters, President Nixon's tie, guns, knives, bibles, water guns, spray paint, spray glue, markers, frogs, French miniature poodles, rubber ducks, socks, nail polish, skin, pocket knives, any Garfield novelties, CD’s, videos, living proof that Osama Bin Laden is actually George Bush’s drinking buddy, your soul may be possible. You may keep chainsaws as take-on baggage.

Areida

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Wed Aug 24, 2005 2:11 am

Areida says... · Wed Aug 24, 2005 2:11 am

#30: Though nose-picking is strictly prohibited after dinner, it is a requirement before bedtime.

#31: For the next eight minutes, all children born shall be named "Steve".

#32: All cookies are the official property of Areida.

#33: The word 'tuna' is now a vulgarity.

#34: All persons between the ages of thirteen and eighteen that have hazel eyes must wear price tags on their heads, ranging from $4.73 and $806.94.

(Sorry... couldn't reisist... even though Sam's and Liz's and Sureal's were waaay better...)

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"Most of us have far more courage than we ever dreamed we possessed."
- Dale Carnegie

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Elizabeth

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Wed Aug 24, 2005 11:24 am

Elizabeth says... · Wed Aug 24, 2005 11:24 am

31: For the next eight minutes, all children born shall be named "Steve".

LMAO AHAHAHA

ALL THE COOKIES ARE YOURS?!??!!

TUNA... bloody smelly tuna. tuna tuna tuna!

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Zion

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Wed Aug 24, 2005 12:29 pm

Zion says... · Wed Aug 24, 2005 12:29 pm

You tuna!

You stupid tuna! Now, like, i dotn get one thing really......if tuna is a vulgarity from now on can we say tuna on the boards? cuz like, you know with the entire...law enfrocment and coughtheironfistcalledjackcough I dont suppose we should say tuna. right?

*pokes nearby tuna*

Is this tuna dead? *blank stare* EEEk! A dead tuna!

Without sensibility no object would be given to us, without understanding no object would be thought. Thoughts without content are empty, intuitions without concepts are blind.

Immanuel Kant
"Critique of Pure Reason"

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Elizabeth

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Mon Sep 12, 2005 1:56 pm

Elizabeth says... · Mon Sep 12, 2005 1:56 pm

Crazy people got skills. So go run around the street naked and then make that half court shot.

BOOM!

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deleted6

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Mon Sep 12, 2005 6:20 pm

deleted6 says... · Mon Sep 12, 2005 6:20 pm

All people who hate Knights will be put in thwe stocks an have rotten fruit and veg thrown at them (god i'm evil)

We get off to the rhythm of the trigger and destruction. Fallujah to New Orleans with impunity to kill. We are the hidden fist of the free market.
We are the ink, we are the quill.
[The Ink And The Quill (Be Afraid) - Anti-Flag]

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Elizabeth

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Tue Sep 13, 2005 2:51 am

Elizabeth says... · Tue Sep 13, 2005 2:51 am

yes....
yes....

If you can read this you are ver qulified for an FBI job, thus you must die.

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