What little he could feel was on his faceEr. That sounds odd. "He could feel his face" or "What little he could feel was his face" or don't change it at all, but it sounds weird.
increasingly burning sensation
His hairs raised on the back of his neck as the metal table he was laying on touched his freshly woken skin.lying (I can't believe I caught that...)
barely opened his eyes.you can't barely do anything, you either do or don't. But I think this annoys me more because its "finally, barely" and that sounds odd.
tight around his wrist.plural, isn't it? Wrists.
He came to a T-branch stood idly, waiting for it again.I think you can see what is wrong for yourself in that one.
"I slave to God,"is that supposed to be I swear to God?