Crazy Questions

OMGZ, IT'S THE APOCALYPSE!!!!!!!!!!!
Nah, purple skies are always good.

How much trouble would I get in if I gave my teacher a pre-addressed cardboard box, to
Mr. L. Satan
666 Deepest Pit
Hell

with instructions inside telling him to put the box on his doorstep and get in it?

I'd say you would get into thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis much trouble.


I stuck the pointy part one of those small green army guys up my nose. I think it went a little too far because now I don't know math. Why are my ears bleeding?

Your ears are bleeding because the Crumple-Horned Snorkacks stabbed you with theri...uh...horns...

Raise your hand if you got that allusion.

How come Dorothy went to see the Wizard because, because, because, because, because of the wonderful things he does, but they never told us what wonderful things he did?

It's all a conspiracy, man. The government doesn't want us to find out, but the wizard's actions that are deemed as "wonderful things" include human sacrifices and urinating. He keeps the sacrifices under raps, but let's just say there's a reason why they call it the yellow brick road. She doesn't know what this psycho is actually doing so she continues to refer to his actions as "wonderful things."


Will Bellsouth finally get around to hooking up my Internet connection this month after promising they would do it for me about 2 months ago?! If not, when do you think they'll decide to pull they're heads out of their asses and actually do something useful with their dust collected muscle tissues they call brains?

(Opium rules! Bellsouth sucks!! Don't do drugs kids.)

Their heads are stuck in their asses and has been so for the past 2 months. So it depends on when someone will help them ouy of this tricky dilema.

What does 1x1x1 equal?

It's a hippo silly. Duh, don't you know your basic math?

Hippo+Hippo=cat
cat+cat = fish
fish+fish = goose
Goose * cat = donkey

Duh!

Are you a ninja? Are you? Anwser carefully...

of course, I have those crazy ninja skillz. Im so sneaky no one knows i am.

If the square root of 148 was 12 minus 4 times a goat, how much wood could a woodchuck chuck by the end of the year?

7,896.3x % of 7 chuckled wood chips.

What is the opposite of ?

or


Why do humans have fingernails? Are the ends of our hands really that much more vulnerable than the rest?

So we can play guitar!

What is the best place to buy salt water taffes?

Nantucket! But then again, Nantucket is just the best place ever, all around.

Why do desk drawers open out and not up from the top? Seriously. That would save so much more space.

I can't actually tell if you're being serious, but I suspect not. Because if drawers opened up they wouldn't be drawers (and you'd have to move whatever was on your desk to get at the contents).

How long before Greenland is actually green? Or by that time, will it be covered in water?

3 hours. Why? were you planning a vacation there? I'd suggest Iceland. It's very green there.

How come tehy named Apple computers after a fruit if you're not supposed to eat and get your fruit juic stuff on the computer?

Because they were all hippies living in the pot filled 60's.


Why does my brain hurt?

You stuck that army man too far.

Why doesn't anyone notic that the human race is evolveing?