burial of these lovely sins

Napo 2025





trapped six feet under earth
pure white bones tainted
hiding the parts of me I couldn't destroy
in this deathly embrace
enamored with my own mortality
in love with my hatred
this self induced suffocation
as I pile the dirt higher

.1 chained to our hate

Earth shattered in our desperation
words spat with poison
minds starving
these ideas in our heads stolen for lucre
infected with our hateful souls
denied our ability to conquer our stones
sisyphus runs the world
enamored with the safety of his endless struggle
He cracks his whip made of fortune
we are guided by the pain of needing admiration
we blind ourselves with temporary pain
we hold our ignorance close like a friend we never truly trust
slaves to the ideals we hate
suffocated in our sins
Hiding the things we care about in pretense
burying our sins in this masquerade called humanity

2. the disease of indecision
These paths that twist and turn
decisions like snakes winding
they strangle me without release
my hands tremble as I take the fates place
sitting here waiting for the bell to chime
chasing the sand in the hourglass
this futile pursuit of happiness
searching through rubble for a mirror that isn't broken
a version of myself I can live with
when I look back at my steps
do I see regret dripping like blood from the thorns in my side
do I see the faces of people who changed me and I them
do i walk my halls of memory
and hear the echoes of laughter
i sit long and ponder until i am and old
the fool on the hill who sat too long
waiting for the world to fall into place
so busy waiting for life to come
it passed me by

3. the price of admiration

this lovingly carved effigy
the mask you wear
it tells the world a story
of just how lovely you are
you walk on the shining stage
to raucous applause
it drowns out the cries of those you left behind
they seep in your mind like sickly sweet poison
it drips out your mouth when you speak
haunted by the spirits of the hearts you killed to be here
carve your mask in stone dear friend
it lasts longer that way
stone is harder to break
make your heart stone too
it weighs heavy
it steals the breath from your lungs
admiration will take your life
cut away the worst of you in the mirror
it will eat you away
so make your skin stone
but the crown of glory is beautiful
this sickly pride you wear like armor
it will consume your mind
you will be admired
as a statue trapped on the pedestal built from regret
you cannot escape it
you're stone now

4. these hours wasted
I embrace despair in my cold dead arms
it covers me like a funeral shroud
rotting in this coffin watching the sun pass me by
i feel the shreds of who I have been slipping away
a voice tells me to just get up
dig my way out with bare nails and suffocate in the dirt
but I am dead now
i wait for mourners to lay flowers at my grave
but they never come
no tears fall onto the well trimmed grass
it is easier to sit in the comfort of death
than to take the hand of life
life is the bright light that blinds me
the breath that fills my lungs
life is painful
this convalescence is simple
eyes pass with shame projecting on to my limp figure
just get up they admonish
they are blind to the six feet of dirt holding me fast
so my gravestone reads out
"the lazy fool"
that is my legacy now
until the day I take life's hand
embrace my broken heart to mend
invite the air into my lungs
and free my mind from this disease
until that day I rest in the peace
of being dead to the world

5. The solitude of gluttony

fingers clutching cold lifeless ideals
collecting meaningless objects
until the room is filled and the heart is empty
a thousand clocks tick off hours in this room
piles of worthless objects fill my lonely mind
kept safe hidden in the symbols of my wealth
kept safe in the warm caress of my greed
i scoff at those dying on the street side
for deep down i see i am poorer than they
love has not set eyes on me in many years
my envy is too vast for my heart to be found
it has torn my soul
I am but a shell now

6. the deadly sin of thinking too loud

say just what they say
do just what they tell you to do
don't forget to
smile
get out of your head
stop overthinking
there's no need for
thinking
here
don't ask questions simply understand
keep in line one in front of the other
or are you too stupid to follow these simple instructions
shame
on
you
for not understanding this world
you are the only one acting this way
don't forget your friends don't love you
because you don't look like them
your parents are disappointed in you
because you look just like them
hear these voices they are your guide
they are correct
your body doesn't fit these standards
your mind is toof ar outside of the box
remember to be different
stop being so different
hear
my
words
fol l o w my WoRds
always remember
you
are
alone
good now the world will love you
your perfect little smile
good grades
proper posture
a good little girl
suffocate yourself in approval
bow so low you reach your coffin
wrap yourself in shame
remember your place
cover your shoulders
girls dont speak their mind
boys don't cry
we are all equal as long as I am higher than you
we are united as long as I hold the power
you should smile more you're so pretty
why are you smiling? there's nothing to be happy about here
don't you know people are starving
eat your food
stop eating so much you p i g
be confident
don't be so obsessed with yourself
this is our world of double standards
you fit in
keep in line
remember your place
until the day you die
or
until the world stops spinning

7. A last goodbye to these imperfections
this projected perfectionism we hold so dear
we with hearts of selective sinners
was we avoid broken mirrors all too revealing
we form our masks from lies we were told as children
we admonish with sharp tongues while we hide our own faults
blood dripping down our mouths from beautiful lies
poison spat from hateful words that seep into our bones
paralyzed with the fear of our own ticking clocks
the cold embrace of mortality
trapped in the prison of our pride
pretending these bars to be grand jewels to be admired
rotted away dreading the coffin
secure in our convalesce
life moves on without us
we hold on to our priceless possessions
at the end of the day poor in our gluttony
so enamored with our self proclaimed wealth
our souls are eaten away
we hold these sins so dear
as we strive to fit in to these presold boxes
ideations of who we should be
we hide these parts of ourselves
we accept the sins we bear and reason it away in our personal need
explain our faults away to the judgmental eyes our or souls
we walk this graveyard of people we have been
shame carved on gravestones
telling a story
we lift our voices in a funeral song
a burial of these lovey sins