A car pulled up to a new house in Chicago. A family of five came out of the van. It was a father, mother, older boy, another boy and a little girl.
The father told the younger boy and the little girl to start moving the boxes into the house. The kids did as they were told. As the moving was taking place, the mother looked at the house with disgust and said to her husband “the house looked prettier when the real estate agent showed the pictures to us.” The man just nodded to her and screamed at the two small children to hurry.
As soon as all the boxes were in the house the whole family was putting everything away and cleaning the house. When the household was settled from cleaning the eldest child whose name was Bryan asked his mother “Where’s my room?” she answered pick any room. So Bryn rushed upstairs with his siblings following close behind. Bryn chose the second to biggest room, for his father wanted the master bedroom. Next to have a room was Joe, second eldest of the children. After Joe got his room, Joe noticed something wrong “Mom, why isn’t there any more rooms left?” The mother replied “you and your sister Crystal are to share a room.” After this was said everyone left to their rooms, leaving only Joe and Crystal left in the hallway. Joe didn’t object to sharing a room with his younger sister for he was actually hoping to share a room with her. Both siblings were very close, in fact because they were treated differently by their parents than Bryn they shared a relationship where they would do anything for each other.
Joe and Crystal then began putting their belongings away in their room. They had to do everything themselves, because they knew if they asked their parents or their brother for help they would just yell at them and tell them to do it themselves. So they decided to start with their beds. The room was so small that only one bed could fit, though it didn’t bother either one of the kids in the slightest. Crystal was scared of sleeping alone on her bed, so usually she would sleep with Joe anyway, and Joe didn’t mind because he would do anything for his sister.
Their room was crowded. There was no closet to put their clothes in, so they had to compromise and leave their clothing in their suitcases. Since neither of them had any toys, except Crystal who had a stuffed animal bunny, the room was clean and neat.
Joe and Crystal then didn’t have anything to do. So Joe said to Crystal “Crystal let’s think about something fun to play.” “Ok!” Crystal replied. For what seemed forever, Joe and Crystal just sat on their bed and tried to think abut something to play. Until suddenly, there was a ring coming from their doorbell. Joe jumped up from the bed and ran out of the bedroom to get the door.
However, the father reached the door first. When the door was opened an elderly man reached his hand out of the dark of the night and spoke to the father “hello there neighbor!” The father seemed shocked to have a neighbor say hello to him, but just replied with a grunt. The man realized the father didn’t want to shake hands, so he looked at Joe, shook his hand and said “hello there!” Joe was just as surprised as his father was, and when Joe was going to reply, his father stopped him. “What is it you want here sir?” the father asked the elderly man. Offended to be asked such a question, the old man answered in a joking way “since I see you folks just moved in the neighbor hood this morning, I just wanted to say hi and tell you that if you need anything, I live right across the street.” “Oh thanks.” The father mumbled, and shut the door. The father then screamed at Joe and told him to go to his room. The father then left for his own room and slammed the door.
As Joe was heading up the stairs, Crystal was still going down the stairs looking for Joe. “Crystal lets go back to our room.” Crystal was angry that she climbed down the stairs and had to climb them back up already. Joe was going to say something to comfort her, when he heard a tap on the window. He decided to check it out and while holding Crystal’s hand, Joe walked slowly to the window. He looked outside and saw the old man. He was smiling, this smile scared Joe. It made him feel as if the old man wanted to do something to them. Joe was about to go upstairs with his sister, when Crystal started laughing. “What is it sister?” he asked. Crystal pointed at the old man outside and said “the old man is making funny faces.” Joe looked at the old man and began to laugh too! They kept on laughing until the old man suddenly stopped. Behind Joe and Crystal were their parents. The parents just yelled “why are you making so much noise?!” Crystal then began to cry. Joe tried to explain to his parents that the old man was making them laugh through the window. His parents didn’t believe him and his father stated “that’s not possible, I shut the door on him.” The mother then slapped Joe on the check! “How dare you lie to your parents!” His mother wailed. Joe was flung to the floor and tears were streaming down his face. Waiting on the stairs Bryan was laughing. This really angered Joe, so he got up and charged at Bryan. Bryan wasn’t even affected by his attack and just pushed Joe away. Crystal was crying really hard now because of both her parents and the fact Joe was hurt. The mother yelled over the crying and told her husband to kick the kids outside until they’ve learned their lesson.
The father grabbed Joe and Bryan grabbed Crystal. They were then dragged all the way outside and when Bryan was closing the door, he gave Joe and Crystal a smirk.
Joe held Crystal as they both cried together. When Crystal stopped crying, Joe stopped as well. They heard footsteps coming closer to them. Joe covered Crystal and spoke to the darkness “Who’s there?” No one answered, but then the steps were so close that now Joe saw the person. It was the old man. He beckoned to them to come with him. Joe felt it was safe, so holding his sister’s hand, they walked with the elderly man across the street.
). But, to make sure you focus on what needed to be improved the most, I'd just go through and fix these grammar-related things: