An idea I came up with a while back.
I came here to escape this, but everywhere I go I see his face staring back at me. In the twisted, gnarled bark of the trees, and the white cotton wool clouds in the sky. In the shimmering blue river I see his reflection instead of mine. I am alone, except for the woodland creatures who will only come out to frolick when I'm gone. I wander further into the forest, the trees tower above me. I am so small here. I can sense his presence. A bluebird flits above me, hopping from branch to branch, twittering like I should understand him. He circles around me, close but not close enough as to endanger himself. I admire his pretty feathers - he looks so perfect. Is there ever such thing as an ugly bluebird? I try to consider this new concept. Is the bluebird always accepted by other bluebirds? Do bluebirds have fashion trends? Does he feel emotions like I can? Can he feel love, joy and happiness like me? Bluebirds lives are so much less complex than ours, it seems. But how do we know this? I find myself reaching to God, arms outstretched above me - the bluebird twitches for a second, flinches, as if it would fly away, but then seems intrigued. He settles back on the branch, seemingly comfortable with my presence in the woods. He appears to be watching me. I begin to feel weak. I put my arms down. I collapse onto the forest floor. The leaves are consuming me, dragging me in. My vision blurs. I close my eyes and sleep.
I wake to a bright summer's morning. I begin thinking about him again. It seems like there is no escape. But what I am I really running from? I am not scared of his love, so why do I try to avoid it?
To be continued
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