"It was the least I could do." He took the lead. "How are Aashi and Tasia taking things?"
"The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear. Remember that." -Karis Nemik
Tadaaki was quiet for a moment, guilt stabbing at his gut. "Tasia is scared, but I think she was just confused and saw that everyone else was upset, and that made her upset. I don't think understood what happened. She'll be fine."
Aashi was far, far more delicate. She fully understood. Well, she didn't. She never could fully understand. But she knew what had almost happened; knew that it could easily happen again. She was rattled and needed his comfort and he was being the world's worst husband.
"Aashi..." He rubbed his face and sighed. "Needs a better husband than the one she's got."
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Atticus "From the fish mother to the fish death god." - lehmanf "A fish stole my identity. I blame shady" - Omni [they/he]
"Said every good husband about his wife," Tomhas said with a small smile. "The fact that you think that means you're trying hard and doing well."
"The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear. Remember that." -Karis Nemik
"I hope so." Tadaaki mirrored the smile, but he looked tired and far, far older than he actually was. "She'll be fine, eventually. She just... wants so very badly for me to be the person I was before Aleth, and I'm not. And she keeps trying to help but it's... I didn't have the capacity for it last night. But I know she needs to get it out of her system, so I'll do better later."
Was he being a shitty husband, going to comfort Ky before he did his own wife?
Maybe. But Ky was easier. Simpler. All Ky needed was some scaffolding to build off and encouragement to not self-destruct. She didn't try to fix him. Which meant he could breathe around her. Which was much harder around Aashi, as much as he loved her.
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Atticus "From the fish mother to the fish death god." - lehmanf "A fish stole my identity. I blame shady" - Omni [they/he]
"I may be a bit of a hypocrite on this front, but..." Tomhas paused. "Are you two religious at all?"
"The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear. Remember that." -Karis Nemik
(shit, not you making me figure this out on the spot xD)
"I think Aashi still is," Tadaaki answered carefully. "... but I honestly haven't really entertained those conversations when she's broached them, to know how bought in she is... why?"
Tadaaki used to be religious. But if a god existed, then he either wasn't all-powerful or he wasn't all-good. There was no way for him to be both and allow what had happened to them, to happen. He preferred believing there was no god over the intense anger he felt about the thought of a god who could have helped but didn't.
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Atticus "From the fish mother to the fish death god." - lehmanf "A fish stole my identity. I blame shady" - Omni [they/he]
"Sometimes coming together to talk through things with a religious advisor or praying can help," Tomhas told him. "Sara's uncle did that with his wife a decade or so ago and it helped them figure out where in their marriage the strife was and how to fix it. Anneke and I have never done that--never really needed to and never wanted to--but maybe it will help you and Aashi? It can be useful to have a third party."
"The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear. Remember that." -Karis Nemik
"Maybe..." Tadaaki nodded. He felt like that would just lead to him getting ganged up on -- chastised for pushing his wife away and refusing to have open, authentic communication like he used to have with her. He was being a shitty husband. He knew it. They all knew it. He just didn't know how to do better. But, if this was a possible solution, then, "I'll suggest it to her. Thank you."
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Atticus "From the fish mother to the fish death god." - lehmanf "A fish stole my identity. I blame shady" - Omni [they/he]
"Certainly." He dipped his head. "I'm happy to help however I can."
"The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear. Remember that." -Karis Nemik
“I appreciate it.” Tadaaki nodded, then sighed and added quietly, “gods know I need it.”
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Atticus "From the fish mother to the fish death god." - lehmanf "A fish stole my identity. I blame shady" - Omni [they/he]
"It's never a bad idea to ask advice. Having someone to lean on, especially during hard times, is just as important as knowing when to be independent."
"The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear. Remember that." -Karis Nemik
Tadaaki nodded silently at that. Tomhas clearly didn’t realize how heavy Tadaaki was, if he was suggesting he lean on people. Just like he physically crushed Ky when she tried to help him to his bed after a discipline session, he was going to emotionally crush Aashi if he handed over the weight of his burden to her.
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Atticus "From the fish mother to the fish death god." - lehmanf "A fish stole my identity. I blame shady" - Omni [they/he]
(At long last I've created a spotify playlist for Gaius and plan to make one for Tomhas as well!)
Tomhas headed up the stairs to the infirmary. "Did you sleep at all last night, Tadaaki?"
"The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear. Remember that." -Karis Nemik
(Ohhh? I've got one for Pratik and one for Ky :') so much fun)
Tadaaki took a deep breath, then slowly let it out.
"A bit, but not much," he admitted. "I kept..."
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Atticus "From the fish mother to the fish death god." - lehmanf "A fish stole my identity. I blame shady" - Omni [they/he]
(So many great songs apply to characters; just gotta figure out how!)
Tomhas nodded. "I understand that. I was fortunate not to have any nightmares, but I was awake the whole night so..."
"The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear. Remember that." -Karis Nemik
