Two Crows Watch from the Gallows Tree

"Well, a maid or manservant will be up with soup soon. So we can sit and rest for a bit. Aleth will be leaving as soon as Alexander patches him enough to keep him alive--not in the infirmary, of course--so we have about four hours before he's gone. If you're going to watch the beating, I suppose just act as you would if you were actually going to be left behind as leverage."

Ky looked over at Tadaaki, weight falling off her shoulders. Four hours. Four. Before they were rid of Aleth forever. Tadaaki felt himself relax a bit, too, even though he still didn't trust Loquitur quite as much as Ky seemed to. Four hours was a long time for Aleth to plan his revenge.

Then it struck Ky that watching the beating was going to mean being close to Aleth again -- in all his fiery rage. She was sure... fairly sure... hoped that some combination of the nobles and their guards could and would stand between her and Aleth's rage. But the very thought of seeing him again, after all this, made her chest go tight.

"Yes, sir." She said quietly and cringed a bit, looking at the blanket in front of her instead of at Loquitur, imagining Aleth's eyes boring into her. It was all she could do to keep from cowering now, just thinking about it. She was certain she'd melt when she was actually standing before him. "That won't be a problem."

"I did say if," Tomhas reminded her, face softening. "You don't have to go, Kylia. Nobody will make you go." Harold nestled in her lap, purring lazily.

She nodded when he first started talking, appreciating his gentleness, but then he called her-- her eyes snapped up. There was something deep inside her that wanted Kylia to be resurrected from the dead, but it felt like that part of her was as gone forever as everything else she was getting back.

"Kylia," she repeated, smiling. It felt so nice to be called that again. It startled her. But then filled her with a warmth she couldn't even begin to explain. It felt as though they were just skimming over the past four years now -- ignoring all the scars and pain and brokenness that she'd endured as Kyber -- and picking back up with the happiness she knew as Kylia.

She knew that wasn't the point he was trying to make, but at that point, she couldn't quite remember what he was trying to tell her.

Tomhas nodded slightly, smiling crookedly at her reaction. "Yes. You can use that name again, it seems." He couldn't imagine not being able to call himself by his own name. It must feel wonderful for her to be able to speak it again.

She smiled a bit more and wrapped her arms around her abdomen, probably looking more juvenile than she meant to, but nodded. "It's nice... I missed her."

In more ways than one. Kyber was a stupid name, even though she'd given it to herself, just so the nickname could stay Ky, since she was used to answering to that anyway. But, she liked all the other parts about Kylia, too. The Kylia that didn't cower, or have to watch over her shoulder for Aleth, or wear a binder and make her voice gruff. That got to answer to "she" and not have to worry about if her laugh was too shrill.

Free.

Tomhas let her soak in that good feeling, watching the cat in her lap instead. She could decide whether or not she wanted to see Aleth get put in his place later; for now she shouldn't have to worry about that unpleasant toe-scum. That was Tomhas's job.
He'd have a word with his General about setting up a trial for Aleth's return while they waited for Tadaaki to heal up. A trial felt fair, even though fairness was more than Aleth deserved. Either way, Tomhas had a feeling Aleth wasn't long for this world. He didn't mind that at all; the fewer monsters around the better.

Ky kept petting Harold absently. Kylia. Again. Forever.

The more she thought about it, the more benefits she thought of. Would she actually have the option to get married now? She didn't have a preference for genders, but she obviously couldn't pursue a relationship while she was hiding herself. Could she actually have children, if she wanted? Wear a dress-- well, okay, she'd never really liked that one much. But now she could if she ever wanted to.

Her mind slowly went back to what Loquitur had been trying to say when she got distracted by being called her name. Her choice. She didn't have to see Aleth, ever again. She could just sit up here in the infirmary and eat soup and take naps and play with Harold.

But something in her wanted to watch. Not necessarily for the violence -- she figured it would make her flinch and cringe in sympathy pains. But for sweet justice. Aleth deserved whatever they'd do to him, and worse. And, it'd humiliate him if she was there to watch.

That thought made her heart flutter a bit. She usually avoided him being embarrassed at all, since that's what got her hurt. But, this time, he'd be the only one to suffer from his humiliation. He'd get what he deserved. And she wouldn't have to play any part of it.

"I think..." she said thoughtfully, nodding to herself once as she made up her mind. "That Kylia is not afraid of Aleth."

Once she said it aloud, she actually wasn't sure if it made sense or not. But it did in her brain. Kyber was scared of Aleth. Kylia didn't have to be. She hesitated, trying to think of how to explain what she meant.

"He owns Kyber," she said. "Not Kylia."

"Then Kylia wishes to see me, Constance, and Tarr all demolish this piece of garbage before we send him off to the snake?" Tomhas asked. "You're very welcome to." He was secretly pleased she'd made the decision; he figured it might be good for her to see Aleth get knocked down a few pegs without any consequences toward her. "You'll have to assume the guise of Kyber, of course. He still thinks you're his, and I'd like to keep it thst way until he's out of the gates. Is that alright?"

"Yes, of course!" Ky nodded quickly. Then she looked at him sheepishly. "I think it'll take a long time before I'm actually not scared of him... if ever. But I think... it will be good for me to..." Her brow furrowed a bit, trying to think of how to express it. "Well, he's not going to be the strongest person anymore, is he?"

"I doubt he ever was," Tomhas mused. "Strong people don't need to hurt people in order to feel good or big." He suspected Aleth had either had a childhood as fucked up as his and Gaius's or he was just born twisted and wrong. Neither was an excuse for those flowers on Ky's abdomen or the dragon covering Tadaaki's body.
"Healing doesn't have to take place all at once," he said slowly. "It can be as slow as you need. Sometimes painful, sometimes not. What's important is that you can talk to us if it gets hard. It seems you're close with Tadaaki--that's very good. But if you need anyone else, my wife and I will be there for you the whole way. I promise you that."

Ky nodded slowly. That was fair. Tadaaki was both good and big, and the only people he ever hurt were the people Aleth forced him to hurt. And she'd seen the Tadaaki that woke up crying from a night scare. He was good.

She felt overwhelmed again when he kept talking.

"You're very kind." She caught herself, starting to feel a bit more confident, now that confidence wasn't ending quite so badly for her. "I feel like I'm saying that too much, but you are. And there's no way we're ever going to be able to repay you for that... but I appreciate it. A lot. Sir."

Tomhas glanced down at his hands sheepishly. "I'm a modest man, please. But...I'm glad I could help. I don't like it when people are hurting." He paused. "Lyra asked me to help you the day I arrived. She'd guessed there was something up, but I said I wouldn't. I...I've tried to keep out of conflicts like that. Every time I tried to help my brother or sister it made things worse, and after I became Lord I decided I wouldn't be responsible for that kind of pain again. I suppose I was, just in a different way. So I'm sorry for not coming to your aid sooner." He wrung his hands. "And, er, the same goes for you, Tadaaki. If you ever need to talk, we're here for you."

"No, sir, not at all," Ky said quickly, alarmed that he was actually apologizing to her. "I think... that it would have been worse if you had, sir. We are..."

She glanced over at Tadaaki. Fucked up. That's what they both were. Physically, emotionally. Aleth had found the things that could hurt them the worst, then kicked there.

"Bad at trust," Tadaaki finished for her. He felt himself flush a bit, not realizing he didn't want to be part of the conversation until he'd already accidentally thrust himself into it. "I mean no offense to my lordship--" He cringed. That was the wrong way to say it. He always messed the titles up. "But I only trusted you because Ky did."

"And I only..." Ky squirmed, feeling like she was dangerously close to insulting him. Then she decided to be frank. Like Kylia would. She straightened her shoulders a bit, but still couldn't quite look at him. "Well. A lot of people want to know what Aleth knows, and they try to get it out of me. And sometimes they threaten and hit, but sometimes they pretend to be nice to me because they think I'm stupid."

"I'm not stupid." She risked a glance up. "But, you didn't try to interrogate me about Aleth. You were being kind just to be kind. And I don't think I would have believed that you weren't just trying to hurt me if you'd stepped in right away, sir. I think this is better."

(Alrighty, time for me to hit the hay. Goodnight!)

"I...I'm glad." Tomhas dipped his head slightly. "I really couldn't give a damn about all his nonsense--what would I have to gain?" He shook his head. "Paranoid fool. He'll have to watch his back around Gaius if he thinks I was bad. Gaius has ways of pulling things out of people quickly."