that thing they call wanderlust

So I caught the NaPo fever and decided to give it a shot again this year.

Maybe going with a loose travel theme, but I might completely abandon it after a couple of poems?

lol my first poem wasn't even a true travel poem whoops

I have no clue what I'm doing.

Spoiler

I'm actually going to bend the rules a bit and my target is a poem every second day - ie, 15 poems. I think in the past doing a poem every day has been really daunting and I've psyched myself out which has meant that my NaPo record is a grand total of two poems

I. what could be

let's pretend-

just for a second
or maybe a minute
hell, let's make it ten

-let's pretend there could be more
of this, of us
and that us exists beyond tonight
i could get used to your caresses

let me imagine-

i'll be inscrutable
just play it cool
in case it's all in my head

-let me imagine this could be real
you wouldn't kiss me
if you didn't mean it
i'll romanticise you more than you deserve

i'll remember-

i walked away
from you and my delusions
we'll never meet again

-i'll remember you imperfectly
a fleeting memory
of a brief spark and a slow fade
it's all there could have been

II. that thing they call wanderlust (part one)

sometimes i forget the feeling
the intoxicating rush
of the new
the unfamiliar
the as-yet unexplored
and the agitated ease
of being wilfully
and deliberately lost
in a whirl of unknown alphabets
and a symphony of undecipherable sentences
even the air feels different here
maybe a little smokier but also
like it's alive
with a crackle of possibility
and the tangible potential
of new adventures
around the next corner

III. curtains

my shyness was a semi-opaque curtain
rarely drawn back
an ever-present barrier between me and the world
just thick enough to cut me off
block me out
obscure me from the rest of the room
my quietness left me forgotten
unnoticed and all but invisible

because what would the shy girl have to say?

for the longest time
i dreamed of a cure for my quietness
in an outgoing soul who would tear back that curtain
and i would no longer be cut off
blocked out
obscured from the rest of the world
but that outgoing soul never availed
and the curtain hangs there undisturbed

you tell i'm quiet like i haven't noticed

some days upon closer inspection
the curtain seems thinner than it once was
more translucent and less susbtantial
like maybe it won't cut me off
block me out
obscure me so completely
like one day it could be opened
maybe

IV. before whenever

You have a bus to take tomorrow
and in three days time
I'll have a flight
back home

but we still have tonight

I'll be Julie Delpy in a brown maxi dress
you can be the dashing stranger
for whom I throw all plans away
for the chance of something
I can't yet identify
We can talk all night
chaperoned by an unfamiliar city
that if not for the quirks of fate
we both may never have seen

In a few years time
this city's name will remind me of you
and of these fleeting hours we've shared
I forget that it's only been hours
since I first saw you

Tonight the world no bigger than Vienna
or whatever city we choose to wander
We could have been anywhere
or with anyone
but I'm glad I'm here with you

Don't talk about the future
and all the days that come after tonight
Let's both just fall blindly
and whole-heartedly
in love with the illusion
that tonight will never end

Time bends in strange ways
and I can't imagine
not knowing you

we were strangers before tonight

we'll be strangers again tomorrow

Before you take that bus
Before I'm on a plane
and every minute takes me further from you
Before whenever we must part ways
we'll explore these streets together
and let the night stretch out
then suddenly
it ends

Don't promise me a sequel
in a naively planned reunion

just give me tonight

Number 4 legitimately gave me goosebumps, particularly this:

"In a few years time
this city's name will remind me of you
and of these fleeting hours we've shared"

So romantic, and it has a real Roman Holiday feel about it <3

I agree with Stella - there's a lot of kind of holiday-esque, one-last-night-together in "what could be", and the wanderlust and travel imagery in II and IV, they're exciting and adventurous and draws me in completely.

Curtains felt really special though, I think because I relate as an introvert. <3

you tell i'm quiet like i haven't noticed

Ahhhhhh <3

Spoiler

@StellaThomas and @Audy Thank you so much for your kind words, it really means a lot <3

V. that thing they call wanderlust (part two)

home is not where my heart is
whispers that knowing little voice
that same one that on those lonely nights
murmurs what else, what else, what else

*

part of my heart lies in the streets of phnom penh
in the anarchic clamour of scooters and tuktuks
who weave through the traffic in rapid choreography
and the unkempt liveliness of its wide dusty roads



another piece watches the sun set over trebinje
whose equal parts timeless and timeworn centre
exudes a captivating, unforced tranquility
through the old ottoman stone



yet another delights in budapest after dark
when the city is bathed in warm golden glow
and the banks of the danube cast a quiet kind of magic
as circling bats dance overhead



paris was the first to steal a slice for itself
after all these years there it still remains
in the glittering lights of the eiffel tower
and the je ne sais quoi prettiness of saint-germain

my heart dreams of five foot ways
of temples and fortresses and once-mighty castles
it is forever entranced by a craving for the elsewhere
the places i have loved and those i am yet to see


*A/N: The photo for Phnom Penh is actually from Battambang since I didn't have any photos that would work from the former. Just imagine similar architecture but way more busy,

VI. invisible together

my dear, let's be invisible together
we'll take the cheap seats
off to the side and above it all
(it isn't the best view but it's good enough for you and i)
sit by my side and we'll watch the world
all the passersby who don't notice us
but while you're here i don't mind
not being seen
(i would rather your shy smile and soft voice anyway)
right now, the only person's time i want
is yours
my dear,
i can live with being invisible
if we're invisible together

VII. memory

i seized the day only to throw it away
later that night
now memory sits on the horizon's edge
just about in sight
but when i run towards it
it remains unreachable
all i have to scrutinise is fragments
i try to piece them together
make them fit so they reveal what's missing
but the longer i try the wider the gaps become
and the fragments i was holding
turn to vapour around the edges
and escape like mist from my grasp
one thought remains solid and immediate
a reminder from my more sensible self
don't mix your bloody drinks

VIII. some kind of serendipity

we were never going to be forever
even though it felt like the stars aligned
when we met and there were too many coincidences
for it to ever be coincidental
you and me in the same place
existing in the same thought
could never be destined for longevity
and the instant we separated we unravelled
but for a moment
for just a dizzying whirlwind of an instant
some strange kind of serendipity drew us together
and we were