in another time

16 posts1, 2
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2017 — war-torn, lovestruck
2016 — unwritten letters
2015 — poetry, and other painkillers
You either worship something higher than yourself or end up worshiping yourself

Naturally Tipsy ©




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(A Prelude — Poems from March)
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#1
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#2
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#3
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#4
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#5
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#6
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#7
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#8
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#9
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#10
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#11
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#12
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You either worship something higher than yourself or end up worshiping yourself

Naturally Tipsy ©




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//bops in excitement
How to format poetry on YWS

this sky where we live is no place to lose your wings




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I admire you as a poet, I just love all of your poems :) I love how clear, crisp and distilled they are, each one with its own focus that really hammers in the emotions of the moment, while still providing ample exploration and layers but without the need to be cloying in language. Everything feels powerful, carefully considered, and the end result is beautiful. The order that they are in is well considered, it really feels like a journey reading from one to the other. I can definitely see these in a book and I would definitely buy them.

Number 2 is my favorite - that all very important, existential question and I felt the quote primed us for the experience, and the first two lines just blew me away. The "after us" repetition was really beautiful. There's something about those soft fricative-sounds, they are really simple but powerful. It enhanced for me that kind of soft, fragrant almost divine moment where you realize that you're at one with the world and the imagery of course of it being a great big party, and enjoying the moment is something I'd love to hang on my wall as words to live by. There are a lot of great lines I can see myself quoting, and I loved reading #3 right after this one, y'know. The last line "this is why planets revolve" goes back to the central theme in all of these, just the love between these voices, the universe, and the universe inside of ourselves.

I come to you wordless,
shorn of language and voice


Beautiful <3 This line feels very meta. Like the experience I'm having currently as I read.

This whole thread is a pleasure.




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Day #1
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You either worship something higher than yourself or end up worshiping yourself

Naturally Tipsy ©




User avatar
Gender Male
Points 194
Reviews 155
Day #2
Spoiler
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You either worship something higher than yourself or end up worshiping yourself

Naturally Tipsy ©




User avatar
Gender Male
Points 194
Reviews 155
Day #3
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You either worship something higher than yourself or end up worshiping yourself

Naturally Tipsy ©




User avatar
Gender Male
Points 194
Reviews 155
Day #4
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You either worship something higher than yourself or end up worshiping yourself

Naturally Tipsy ©




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Okay, Arc. I absolutely love all of the poems you've put out for NaPo thus far, but I especially love the first and fourth. You have an absolute talent for writing poems that pack a punch--great job on honing that. A suggestion for the fourth though is to make 'we grew up quickly' to 'we grew up so quickly' for more of an emphasis on the fact. Other than that, keep up the powerful, impactful lines you're always putting out!

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Day #5
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You either worship something higher than yourself or end up worshiping yourself

Naturally Tipsy ©




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Gender Male
Points 194
Reviews 155
Day #6
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You either worship something higher than yourself or end up worshiping yourself

Naturally Tipsy ©




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Points 194
Reviews 155
Day #7

Song for Asia - fragment #1

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You either worship something higher than yourself or end up worshiping yourself

Naturally Tipsy ©




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Points 194
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Day #8

Song for Asia - fragment #2

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You either worship something higher than yourself or end up worshiping yourself

Naturally Tipsy ©




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Points 194
Reviews 155
Day #9

Song for Asia - fragment #3

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You either worship something higher than yourself or end up worshiping yourself

Naturally Tipsy ©




User avatar
Gender Male
Points 194
Reviews 155
Day #10
Spoiler
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You either worship something higher than yourself or end up worshiping yourself

Naturally Tipsy ©



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