Novelty Novel Covers

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Looking for a cover just to laugh at while admiring your super serious one from another shop? Then you've found the right place.

25 points a piece just to cover the time and to put some sort of price on this.

You might remember the olden days, once upon a time when I made these originally.

Novelty: an article of trade whose value is chiefly decorative, comic, or the like and whose appeal is often transitory
aka that weird crap they made a fancy name for.

Novelty Shop: a store catering to tourists who loaded up with souvenir pennants and other novelties.
aka this shop, sort of.

Guidelines are as follows:
1. Give me the title of your novel. I can just work from that and produce something based on my predictions just from the cover.
2. Or add in a summary of like 3 sentences to describe everything that happens. \
-first sentence serious tagline
-second sentence odd scene that happens
-third sentence something isolated and weird that you wouldn't normally describe for the main summary
3. I can hand draw this or whip up a computer version. If you want a sketch, add an extra 5 points onto before mentioned 25 points.
4. Special requests like background or font or specific colors will be filled for an extra 25 points.

Work making jokes about other novels.
Spoiler

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tfios spoof.png
tfios spoof.png (86.65 KiB) Viewed 1886 times


And here is some of my past work on my own novels.
Spoiler


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Know someone with a novel who'd like one of these stupid things? They make great holiday presents btw.

the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death





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Banners
1. What do you want on the banner? Your username? Your name? Some quote or joke or line from a meme?
2. What would you like the background to be? Give a description or just post something.
3. Font???
4. Anything else you think should be brought to my attention.

Possibilities
- Avatars
- Avatars of Avatars
- Cat meme location service
- Hit me with your best shot because I have done no creative work in awhile
- Joke covers of any novel
- Possibly applying to movies and television and music

the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death





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If my credentials weren't good enough already, here's another piece.
things gone with the wind.png
things gone with the wind.png (3.81 MiB) Viewed 1868 times

catcher in the rye.png
catcher in the rye.png (1.83 MiB) Viewed 1813 times

Image

the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death





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Okay, well, despite the fact that you've read a good chunk of the Chosen Grandma story, Imma order one of these ridiculous novelties. (Btw the one for The Fault in Our Stars is my favorite.) Although I want a better title at some point, for the purposes of obviousness and ridiculousness we can just go with "The Chosen Grandma."

Just the regular order is good, although let me know if you want me to do the three-line-fake-summary thing and I can do that, instead of you going off what you've read/the title/what you think is going to happen.

Aaaaaaaaand Imma get those points to you right now.




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@BlueAfrica
Here's a first draft so you can decide where you want this to go.
Image

the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death





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Omg "bingo night just got real." I can just hear Edna going, "What?! No, this is the wrong story, I hate bingo..."




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well I could have done knitting but bingo and saruman and old ladies with pistols looked good in print.

the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death





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Bingo is kind of funnier anyway, I think. Like knitting could definitely be funny, but considering people get shockingly competitive over Bingo I think it works out really well here.




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Alright, I don't have a comment card but I'll assume you're satisfied with the service. If you ever need anything else, just give me a shout.

the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death





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Okay I'll go for a novelty novel cover B) title for the novel is Hell or High Water, and I can give you that summary if you want? Otherwise, I place my trust into your judgement *bows* and if it affects anything, the story is about pirates.

also the Catcher and the Rye <3
I believe in a universe that doesn't care and people that do.

You and I, we are matter, and it matters.

they/them




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@scribbleinks
i just have a couple of simple things in mind based off of the title, so if you're cool with jokes about the title, then i don't need a description.

the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death





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sounds good to me!
I believe in a universe that doesn't care and people that do.

You and I, we are matter, and it matters.

they/them




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@scribbleinks
here's 2 different versions
take whichever you like
they're equally stupid
2nd is a supernatural reference lol

hell or high water v1.png
hell or high water v1.png (1.39 MiB) Viewed 1743 times

hell or high water v2.png
hell or high water v2.png (420.99 KiB) Viewed 1743 times

the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death





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<3 I love the first one a little more (also I have never watched supernatural but I've heard lots of things), but they're both great! Thank you!
lol the first one is pretty much 100% accurate regardless
I believe in a universe that doesn't care and people that do.

You and I, we are matter, and it matters.

they/them




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Reviews 766
@blueafrica
Are you actually interested in another Chosen Grandma cover?
If so, I've got ideas.

the brigadier rides again!
LMS VI: Lunch Appointment with Death




If a million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing.
— Anatole France