What the Hey!

3 posts
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Gender Male
Points 890
Reviews 8
This is my first song that i wrote on a postcard.
Please crit so as i can learn from it

Staring up at the blue sky,
Nothing on of my mind
Whiny B***ards moving around me
I pass out on a high.

Passing judgement ain't right by me
Just leave it up to curiousity
I'm no longer an exibit,
For you to moot over

No longer caring,
Just despairing,
Suit's don't get it,
And neither do i
No point in living,
might as well just die.

I'm a dreamer, dreaming of the impossible,
Reaching up and moving on,
Let bygones be bygones,
When nothing matters,
What's the point,
Might as well leave it all behind




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Gender Female
Points 6165
Reviews 665
Lol. I really liked this, even though I'm not sure what was the chorus, verse, bridge, etc. Also, the title was er...yyyeah. However, I don't think there needs to be anything changed. It's fine just the way it is, really.
when there's nowhere to go, it's time to grow up.




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 5890
Reviews 145
Very dark, but very nice. What are the chord progressions? (If you play guitar, that is...)
"You can go a long way with a smile. You can go a lot farther with a smile and a gun." -Al Capone



To answer before listening—that is folly and shame.
— Proverbs 18:13