It's all so...

Everything feels a little like
Misery,
And it all seems so
melodramatic
But I can't seem to think my way out
The only strength I can find is my love for you
But it looks like that's
gone now too.
Numb, no love,
no laughs,
no life
numb inside.

'Cuz you're gone
--------------------

RIP Hannah

♥

-Maggie

.................................
Ahh.... Um... Wow...
Nobody is really dead... are they?! I mean... dead people... scare me sort of.

I liked this... I liked the first two lines but then after that things sort of got ... wordy, not poetry-y... I can't explain it.

One thing I didn't really like was the 'Cuz, but then again it's because I don't really use that word.

Yeah some one really did die. My friend Hannah. September 2nd.

I liked this... I liked the first two lines but then after that things sort of got ... wordy, not poetry-y... I can't explain it.

I think I know what you mean. I guess it wasn't really poetry to begin with I was just sort of writing my thoughts down.

And your right I should change the the 'Cuz to because....

-Maggie

Tropicana wrote:Yeah some one really did die. My friend Hannah. September 2nd.

I liked this... I liked the first two lines but then after that things sort of got ... wordy, not poetry-y... I can't explain it.

I think I know what you mean. I guess it wasn't really poetry to begin with I was just sort of writing my thoughts down.

And your right I should change the the 'Cuz to because....

-Maggie

But thats just what poetry is, writing your thoughts down on a piece of paper or typing it up on a computer then arranging it in any order you please. I dunno if you should get rid of the Cuz but....If thats who you are I would keep it but, if it isn't you I wouldn't.

Have you read my 'Broken'? It's a little similar in theme. Not motivation, though. I'm just come up with depressing poetry for whatever reason.
Sorry about your friend.

But thats just what poetry is, writing your thoughts down on a piece of paper or typing it up on a computer then arranging it in any order you please. I dunno if you should get rid of the Cuz but....If thats who you are I would keep it but, if it isn't you I wouldn't.

Also a good point. I think I'll keep it. Because kinda makes it flow weird.

Have you read my 'Broken'? It's a little similar in theme. Not motivation, though. I'm just come up with depressing poetry for whatever reason.
Sorry about your friend.

Uh, no I haven't. Is it in lyric poetry? Or in another thread?

Thanks *hug*

Just wanted to say that I love the first four lines of this poem, they are truly original . the way 'Misery' is put on a line of its own- when you read it your voice literally drops.. very niice

*Grins* Thanks mer! That's exactly how I wanted it! I tried to do every two lines like that but it didn't work out so well *winces*


-Maggie

Yeah, 'Broken' is in lyric poetry. I love the rhythm of

And it all seems so
melodramatic

Live long and prosper, dude.

Thanks! =) I'm so sorry Ididn't post on Broken... I kinda forgot about it *winces* I'll go look it up in a minute....