Dare I Say

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Don't let these troubles come down and splatter you
Like rain from the dark clouds, dangerous and wet.
Force you to the ground, then drench and depress you,
As tears stream down your cheeks holding problems of your debt.

Don't let the folk who assume what's best for us
Make you change yourself; for better or for worse.
Or fear your suppressed soul turning love into nothingness,
Like candles being blown out- this love will soon disperse.

Life is like a blackbird, flying every single morn.
It takes off, then flies up and down til it finally finds its way.
Yet if winds carry it all the way, its feelings would be torn.
Life's never in one's full control- dare I say?




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I liked your poem very, very much. But the one issue I had was that you rhymed 'you' and 'you' in the first stanza. Other than that it was perfectly perfect. =)




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Tropicana wrote:I liked your poem very, very much. But the one issue I had was that you rhymed 'you' and 'you' in the first stanza. Other than that it was perfectly perfect. =)


Agree'd you rhymed you and you together in the first stanza. It was perfect other then that. I liked how you described everything.
How can you prove that we exist? Maybe we don't exist...




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love the sentiment. I don't know if I like 'dare I say' at the end, but it might grow on me. good poem.
"....I hold with those who favor fire", Frost



You must never give into despair. Allow yourself to slip down that road, and you surrender to your lowest instincts. In the darkest times, hope is something you give yourself. That is the meaning of inner strength.
— Uncle Iroh