xxcarly

single clearing, with it’s bee-nests hanging all around them. He waited, trying to allow the sisters to finish in peace; but their growing moans and husky whispers had him almost ...

Hey NYC! I'm Carly. What's up? Your fan-fiction title caught my eye, and it really fits in with the story. Kudos for that. Now... as for the rest of the ...

I love your use of adjectives! Well written! I also like the plot-- it's very intriguing. But I don't think you should put 'i was once a happy and outgoing ...

Wow. Uhm. It's a nice idea and all, but the way you wrote is is a tad past the line of confusing. "This is how I want it to go." ...

Wow! That's all I can say right now. Wow! Great story, great plot line so far. Yes, like you mentioned, there are some grammatical mistakes. But that's alright for now. ...

Sorry. I don't really take this too seriously. I've seen many many MANY better Jonas FanFics in my time. Sure, it's a nice outline, a nice plot, but it sure ...