ultraviolet

Hey, so, looking on your Chapter One thread, I see that the prologue is chapter one... so I'm kinda now assuming that this is your thread for all of your ...

The pacing's definitely better. The ending feels like an ending, not like there's still supposed to be more so you can explain it to us. And I disagree with Tabby ...

I've made some minor changes to this and sent it in. @Skins - I didn't change everything you said, mostly for reasons I had in mind while writing it. Even ...

Yeah. :) But I think it would work just a teensy bit better if you replaced "feels" on the sixth line with "is." Could just be me thought. But this ...

Hey, are those two paragraphs more easy to read now? I entered in some commas, trying to separate things that I sort of grouped together. Is it better this way, ...

Hey, thanks for the review! I'll fix all the typos, and maybe space out those paragraphs. Oh, and thanks on the whole "dying" thing - I never know which to ...

Hey, if it's not too much trouble, would you mind checking out the revised version? Thanks. :)

About the 1st Person left in there, I only did it quickly before, but now I read through and I think I got it all. And about the confused part ...

Thanks for the reviews! canislupis>> You said how it doesn't make sense that she's saying that... I think I'll change this to third person, so that the narrator does have ...

Weapons AND violet eyes? This officially rocks! xD

Thanks, guys. And I think I'll come back to this, fix it up a little, but not until after NaNoWriMo. It's just not worth the time while I desperately try ...

Kyll, there are two song lyrics that have made me think about the subject enough to connect this story to it. In Taylor Swift's "Cold As You," one of the ...

Thanks for the review. :) As for the custody issue, I don't really know much how that works (neither I nor any of my friends have divorced parents) but every ...

Edward is often described at "god-like".

Nevermind; that was the revised edition.