theotherone

Hello there. :) I'll begin with the nitpicks, and then go on with my overall impression. So let's begin! :) I think about which way I can go home, the ...

Hello there. :) First off, this seems like good novel. I haven't seen any mistakes so far, so that's good also. I see that you are writing in present tense... ...

Hello there. :) I won't do the nitpicks because I'm don't really want to do this right now, but you can PM me, or just write on my wall if ...

Hello there! :) I'm going to quote all of this, and comment in it, if it's okay. My comments will be in bold, and in red, the correction. Ok here ...

Hello there. :) I'll begin with the nitpicks... well I don't think you have much. :) Cass’ voice rose, her anxiety increasing. He dared look up into Cass’ eyes and ...

Hello there. :) This is a really nice piece, which a lot of girls and guys can relate to. Sayen stood there, the wind whipping through her dark hair. I ...

Hello there, I'm here to do a review as requested! :) I was now stuck going to third period , and it promised to be pure torture. Going to third ...

Hello there. :) I jumped out of bed, pulled off my pink cami and silver boxers (my pjs for that night) , and changed into the yellow dress that I ...

Hello there. :) Well, I'm a little confused with this. They are best friends, and she mentioned that she knew Angela was looking at a guy... Didn't she knows what ...

Hello there. :) "You have only your brother and I , Lea, and I and it makes me worry about you." I switched the 'and I' so it's easier to ...

Hello there. :) Well, another great chapter! This is coming along great, and I think you've got the emotions right regarding Tyler and Melody. The way she panics is just ...

Hello there. :) I have some nitpicks for you. My heart was beating faster as I closed the window. I ran downstairs, trying to be as quiet as I could ...

Hello there. :) So you want to slow down, right? Well I don't think you have to slow down that much, since this is a short story. And if it's ...

Hello. :) Well... This was interesting. I liked it, except for the relationship between Melody and her mother. I don't get why her mother is like that, and why Melody ...

Hello there. :) I went to my room and listened to my Ipod as I did my homework. Jonas Brothers started blasting from my speakers. I also like The All-American ...