sargsauce

Pretty entertaining. I like how it came back to the beginning with Madison and how we could have possibly made the connection there. I think the "oh my gosh" at ...

An interesting story arc, but the execution could use a little work. It was interesting how oddly tense everybody seemed and then you reveal the truth and we understand. But ...

Gorgeous. Quiet and dignified without trying too hard or seeking complications or claiming redemption in such a short story. That is probably its only flaw: it's too short and is ...

An interesting read! The voice is strong and rings with a kind of Russian formality or aristocracy. I feel like I know something of the two characters beyond what you ...

Not too shabby! Fast paced and visceral. There's a little bit of caution in the reader in wondering if it's all a dream/if one or more characters are fake or ...

A very good read. Skilled wordsmanship and a composition as sturdy and thick as a well-made rug. The threads continue from one end to another, between the fish metaphor and ...

The first paragraph was very strong. It brings the narrator's personality into focus and the voice is unique. I like the idea of being shown a picture of terminal cancer ...

Pretty impressive, really! I liked the style a lot. Trapped inside his head and pounding to get out. I liked your choice to not use quotation marks, too; it lends ...

Haha, I must echo lily and say the same about your title. I have read--wait for it----waaait for it---wait for iiiit------ four stories in the science fiction section by now, ...

Do please expand this--I imagine you will, unless you've just dropped the whole thing. I found this piece rather intriguing, compelling, and the sentences themselves are well-written. Your word choice

Nice, but a little cliche. An all too rosy image of brothers (both figurative and literal) in war. The main character is heroic and his friend is wounded and dies ...

I'll admit, I did not read the whole thing, but I read enough to give some pointers. First of all: Proofread. There are a lot of errors that you could ...

Not too shabby! Some pointers: Maybe a different title? This one is a little too...corny, maybe? On one hand, it's okay because of its muted tone and the reference that ...

Cute little thing, but kind of bland and formulaic. You start out in a way that you hoped to grab our attention--he's late to see a girl--but all importance to ...

Not exactly my cup of tea. An in-your-face allegory or life lesson--as demonstrated by the lack of names--without the surrounding world to hold it up. The dialogue started interesting and ...