narniafreak12

Hi, my name's Narniafreak. I guess I'll critique your story as best as I can. Mainly there are little errors that Kara already pointed out, so fix those. Good job ...

First off good job grabbing the attention right away. Makes me wonder what's next, like is the masked man in her room or how is there blood everywhere? Next, in ...

Okay so I thought this was pretty good. Probably better most of the stuff I come up with. Anyways, you could explain what her nightmares are about because it kind ...

Okay so that was pretty good. Nothing like how during Breaking Dawn you get Jacob's point of view as a werewolf. But then again it's not the same thing. What ...

Oh wow this was really good! I almost always feel like crying at the end of the movie because I know Susan doesn't come back. I even thought about writing ...

Okay so like the ending surprised me. I would have never thought that this is what would happen. It was really weird and I really was confused. I did like ...

Okay so I really liked this and if it was a book I'd probably read it more than once. I think that if you started the story here it would ...

Whoa that was awesome! I totally could "see" the character and feel what he/she was feeling. I've never read anything like it though I did like it. And I am ...