myfreindsavamp

First of all, it’s recommended to also review some work too. :) Hello, and welcome to Young Writer’s Society. I watched the way his head fell apart. The pieces reminded ...

I stared at him, trying to figure this whole thing out. I couldn’t remember much of anything from yesterday so I decided to ask him. “What happened? Why am I ...

Terri? Are you coming?” You need to close the quote here :) . “Really! Yesterday I had pickles for breakfast.” That is kind of a stretch, even for me, but ...

Short and sweet this time :smt005 Your i needs to be I. In one of the quotes I noticed that you don’t have a wonderful ',' at the end of ...

Slowly, I opened them to see the driver was a hot guy in a football jersey and long jeans. His face was streaked with blood and sweat and his breathing ...

“Sir, it got very, very close to escaping. We’re waiting for your permission to insert the kill code. I’m close to destroying it with or without your authorization.” This seems ...

Someone told me that too much description in so little space wasn't good, that it made you forget easier (I accidentally kept mistaking some of your people for someone else ...

I sniffed the air and picked up the familiar scents of coffee and glue. Ink and paper. I sniffed the air and picked up the familiar scents of coffee and ...

Although it did have it's sad and unfoucused parts it was beautiful. Sad but beautiful. This will probable not count as a reveiw but heck atleast I can tell you ...

The little girl grew fast because she had the same cromosoms as Jacob Black! Dure! :D The mix of human and vampire was kinda odd but the part with Jacob ...

Okay. First all numbers need to be spelled out. ENter after another person starts to speak. And thrird, just to sound mean( :D :wink: ) print this out and read ...

As said above it doesn't pop out. I had to go back a few times to reread what was said because it made no sense at first but I also ...

Are the little devil things there children? :? I have no idea for you buddy, but this is kinda interesting. I would make more than one paragragh though. Were ever ...

There were a few mistakes I caught at first but I can only explain one. When the boy is blushed it would sound better flushed. Great description other than the ...

It's over. It's so over. Your smell of cheap cologne is nauseating. Your once lovable touch makes my skin crawl. I can't believe I had once loved you. You promised ...