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lyrical_sunshine

  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Breathe

    There's some really beautiful imagery in this poem - such a sense of hope. :) I particularly love your first two stanzas. I am a little confused about the meaning ...

    Jan 5, 2010
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: The Shape of a Moment (after Pugh)

    Wow, this is really, really beautiful. I love the imagery you've created - "waves strum in against the shore" and "leaves shrugging off the cold midnight dew." Awesome job. The ...

    Aug 15, 2009
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: The Keeper

    Hi there! You have some beautiful imagery here, and I love that; the problem I'm seeing is that I don't know exactly what you're trying to say. In a way ...

    Aug 15, 2009
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: just gold.

    This was absolutely gorgeous. I have next to no criticism, except for this line, "(one day, when the sun subsides and the clouds are lit/ with a gold, absent of ...

    Jul 26, 2009
  • Short Story » General, General Re: In the Margins

    Your writing her is great great GREAT, but like everyone else said - it was confusing. Kind of irritating. Because it's not just a piece of writing, it needs to ...

    Jul 10, 2009
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Tied Up

    I love this analogy! So sweet and well thought out. I stumbled over this phrase a little: "Who doesn’t mind waiting that bit long to untie me." Did you mean, ...

    Jul 10, 2009
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Deleted

    This is some seriously beautiful writing. You've done a great, great job with her character - because I know she's a teenager, and even at certain places she talks like ...

    Jul 6, 2009
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: "What do you "

    " What do you " What do you see , when you close your eyes ? Are you with me , [s]whatching[/s] (watching) the sunrise . What do you hear ...

    Jun 30, 2009
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: (Fore)Cast a Windy Spell

    Wow! There is some beautiful awesome imagery here! Great job! I think this is probably my favorite line: The walls packed by ice and tended by Men (is there a ...

    Jun 30, 2009
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: " I just want "

    Hey there! I really like where you're going with this; the rhythm and the cadence of the first couple lines was awesome. I could literally HEAR it, and I love ...

    Jun 30, 2009
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Parallel

    Okay, I really liked this - your imagery and word choice was absolutely gorgeous. However, I'm still not quite sure what this poem is ABOUT. I sense there's some tragedy ...

    Jun 7, 2009
  • Article / Essay » Review, General Re: The Mortal Instruments Trilogy

    I love these books so much. I bought City of Glass on the day it came out, and it didn't disappoint. :) I still think I liked the first too ...

    Jun 6, 2009
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: Little Macey

    Wow, this was so creepy and cool. I loved the voice of the little girl - and I also loved that it felt not quite right, you know? Like she ...

    Jun 5, 2009
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: Sitting in a Rainbow [1]

    The first sentence was long and kind of a run-on - if you could split that into two sentences, it would be better. Okay, now onto my real reviews. :) ...

    Jun 5, 2009
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: the beekeeper

    Kylan Really beautiful structure here. I loved that nothing was capitalized - I'm not sure why, but I think it just gave an extra feeling of chaos and confusion. I'm ...

    May 30, 2009


In any free society, the conflict between social conformity and individual liberty is permanent, unresolvable, and necessary.
— Kathleen Norris