lone-flower

I really liked this. The imagery is fantastic, I could see in my mind's eye what was going on and feel what the girl was feeling. The only line I ...

Why so short? :(( Still, it was a very nice ending. You showed how the fat boy slowly began to not only dream of being thin, but believing he could ...

I really liked this story. But we have a rule saying you have to review two stories first before posting your own. Please try not to break it again. Also, ...

Oooh. Another vampire story :D. I liked this a lot. It's different from the others the way she's still living with her family and her friends accepting her for who ...

Ok. I'm not the greatest poet alive (though I could possibly be the worst), but I love this poem! This is my favorite part: But you're breaking me down, And ...

OMG, I love this!! It's so easy to relate to, with your smooth and simple writing style. Here's some mistakes I noticed: So, I thought, “Oh, screw the milk. It ...

Very nice piece. I won't name the wrong things I'd found since they were most probably typos. I'm sure you'll be able to notice them after rereading the story. Really, ...

I really liked this. Just avoid too much description for your introductions. Instead of grabbing your readers' attention, you lose it. Actually, you could scrap the beginning and start with ...

You said you'd like things to be vague. But, honestly, this was just a bit too vague. That wouldn't have been the case if you're planning on writing a novel ...

Beautiful writing! I love the imagery of the scene described. I love it. And, shockingly, there's nothing to criticize :shock: *aww* Good job!

Wow. Just... wow. That was very beautiful. I loved every bit of it! Now, though I don't want to, here come the criticisms :twisted: : She flinches at [s]his[/s] the ...

I liked it. Except that it was too predictable. The minute you said encantados like parties, I knew Victor was an encantado. Maybe you could mention that fact after his ...

This was very moving and very true. I don't really think the dialogue was forced. What else could they talk about? The only mistakes I noticed were already mentioned, so ...

I absolutely adore this. It's well-written, I'm intrigued by the charaters (plus, I really like their names), your use of language is colourful and wonderfully executed. I was particularly drawn ...

The whole piece is quite lovely :wink: I really like the transformation that took place, with the girl becoming the mute angel. Lovely idea. I don't really have much to ...