jasmine12

Hey there Pink. I'm Jas and I'll be your reviewer for today. Here I gooooo..... She looked around her all she saw were nurses and her mother. She never knew ...

Beginning a story has never been my strong point. I have always gotten ahead of myself, to the exciting stuff you know? Ever since I was a little girl and ...

A loud call from the hall signaled it was “The Big Day”, as Remy’s mom liked it call it, or for the rest of humanity-the first day of school. This ...

Prolouge I walked into the air- conditioned mall, already smelling the deep- fried corn dogs from outside. The mall was loud, as usual. Its summer 2008 and school is starting ...

Hey! She sat there, minding her own business when her granddaughter came in and plopped herself down at her feet. In this sentence, you repeat "her" a few times talking ...

Hey, I'm Jas. I just thought I'd throw in my two cents here. Ben shrugged and sat beside on the bench, I think you mean 'sat beside me' ~~~~~~~~~~ “Cause ...

I eyes wondered upon his handsome appearance. I think you mean my eyes. ~~~~~~~~~ His smile reminds me of when we were together as newborns. Your playing with tenses here. ...

pyjamas. “You do?” My grandpa use to have blue flannel pajama pants. Is that the right spelling? I thought it was pajamas. Maybe it's both? ~~~~~~~~~ "No thankyou, George." Thank ...

Okay wow just just WOW!!! I loved this. Although, an Alien? Really? That's new and different. The bond between them, is what reminds me of Twilight, the conflict between species ...

I wanted to bang the phone down the desk. I couldn’t, wouldn’t , believe the words she just said to me. “What did you just say?” I asked her. I ...

Hello! I finally made it. Sorry it took me so long. Lets get started. but so many people had brought back lurid reports of the new freak that he had ...

Sorry it took so long to get to this. well, here i go! I could barely stand the sight of him, but he was happy, I was leaving and he ...

Hey Ash. Sorry I'm so late getting to this. Heckic week here. Okay, On I go! Verionica's part was amazingly descriptive. I didn't see any real grammar mistakes. It wasn't ...

Hey Jessica, here as promised. First off, if posting an entire story, post the chapters individualy. You'd get more reviews. Having something so long is actualy overwelming for reviewers. Kay, ...

She crept up on her unsuspecting victim in silent stealth. Finally Comma he was going to get what he deserved. The pistol felt heavy in her hands, as she remembered ...