irnbru666

Well the words are inspirational, and it sounds good. But the word "playdough" is kind of contradictory in this style. It's almost as if it's too silly of a word ...

I liked this piece, I can see where you were coming from and, as alot of girls would, know those feelings. I'd love if it this piece was extended, so ...

I think this piece has alot of potential. In a short story, to me, the first lines are where you capture your audience and pull them in, and although your ...

"Then again, he had dated Rebecca." I like how this sentence is brought out on its own, it makes it look like a bold statement, which it is. Joy compares ...

Overall I love how you've portayed that typical kind of brotherly rivalry at the beginning and throughout the story, and at the end brought in the dramatic part where Ralph ...