bro

Yeah, the rhythm doesn't really match there, but then again there is never really a set rhythm in the poem. Also, I added in the part about the english class ...

Thank you very much; ironically, this is actually a poem that was supposed to be written to the style of "Knoxville, Tennessee" but I decided to mix it up a ...

I did not really want to edit this piece, it was really written as an experiment for what I can come up with when I free-write (as in, writing whatever ...

Ironically, this was never meant to be a preview, I was simply writing whatever came to mind. But thank you, and I hope you do enjoy the full, improved version!

Yes, I agree with you that there are several blunders in the story. I had intended on fleshing out the characters more, and giving them depth, through flashbacks. Perhaps I ...

Ziggiefred, thank you very much. I appreciate the kind words. Master Yoda, also thank you very much, not just for your ending kind words, but for the advice. What I ...

A vivid picture is painted, but much of what you write is nonsense. Keep up the good writing style, though.