airforcegirl

I did look it over but mashed and muddled dialouge is something I have always had trouble with. I will go back and edit that right now! And I understand ...

I will edit the mashed dialouge asap! I now see what i did with that sentence, i will have to rewrite that. It is still in it's beginning works, but ...

I liked the sense you were trying to convey here although I was having a hard time working out who she was writing to. The person does not seem to ...

you answered all my questions! great job i love it! i think you should definatly do more with this, and one last question, does she choose door 1 or 2 ...

this is great i love it i read the first part and you are defiantly going to win! you should also make this into a book! i cant wait for ...

this is a good start, not much to work with, keep writing and put more on when you have it! sounds interesting, i always read the first 2 pages before ...