Vrtra

Kills on contact is more of a poison thing. Hydrocholoric acid burns (strips paint), but sodium pentathol (I think that's the term) simulates a heart attack in the body and ...

Looks up at Kaliber and lols. Grammar issues? What about your spelling ones? It was a point though, the grammar is not too bad, but would need a little polishing ...

While interesting, the date and whole prophecy type of thing is overused, but the way you handled it was kinda cool. Definately do more on the actual story, rather then ...

Way too dialogue heavy this time. We know nothing about what your characters are like, but we know their attitudes. Might want to add the kind of descriptions done in ...