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Re: According To... Chapter 1: Glassy Memories (Allana)
Heya! Buggie here to review! So first things first: Please proofread before posting. There are a lot of typos and verb-tense mix-ups and missing commas. Also, reading things aloud never ...
Mar 14, 2014 -
Re: Maelstrom Chapter 4
I kind of wanted a more cliff-hanger-ish ending, but hey, what you did works too! Anyway... I'm back! Let's see, I didn't find any obvious grammar mistakes, so I'll skip ...
Mar 5, 2014 -
Re: Of Fights and Letters: Chapter 1: New Faces
Heya! Welcome to YWS! So... I apologize if I come off as harsh, and let's get this party started, shall we? First off, I didn't find any mistakes in the ...
Feb 26, 2014 -
Re: Diamond of the Lost Soul 6
Hey! I'm back! So, I think your chapters are still too short. If they don't string together the way you want them too, then try adding *** to separate the ...
Feb 23, 2014 -
Re: Random Encounter N°1: Pyrospook
Hello there! Remember me? I'm from the DreamLand SB. Whatever, onto the review! So first: I didn't really see any huge grammatical errors. There was one typo where you just ...
Feb 23, 2014 -
Re: Maelstrom Chapter 3
Ooh! Heya, Ladcat! Remember me? I am so so so excited to read this. At first, I was sort of hesitant because it's from the same universe as the SB, ...
Feb 22, 2014 -
Re: The Last Werewolf Chapter 1
I'm confused! Why does Alec call Zander 'Luke' at the end of the chapter? You may want to fix that if it wasn't intentional. Anyway, I know it's late, but ...
Feb 21, 2014 -
Re: Review day story
Hello there! Figured I'd get a move on before review day starts. So, grammar is lacking here. It's nothing ridiculous like verb tense mix-ups, but your use of semicolons is ...
Feb 21, 2014 -
Re: Sorceress: Chapter 4
Hello there! I haven't read the rest of the story (I probably just missed it) but I suppose it can't hurt, no? So, I didn't find any grammatical errors, so ...
Feb 19, 2014 -
Re: It's Good to be King - Chapter 2
Heya! I'm back! So... I like the era you picked. And the zeppelins! I love zeppelins. Anyways, onto the nitpicking: As for grammar, I noticed a few run-ons and missing ...
Feb 19, 2014 -
Re: It's Good to be King - Chapter 1
Heya! Sorry it took me so long to get to this one. Let's cut to the chase: Grammar: Mostly perfect. I found a few random verb-tense-mix-ups, but that's it. Technique: ...
Feb 15, 2014 -
Re: Pendulum Of Fate 1.3
Hello there! I know it's belated, but welcome to YWS! Now then, it would be wise to have the three chapters 1.1-1.3 posted all together, all as one prologue or ...
Feb 12, 2014 -
Re: Machine City Chapter 3 Part 1
Hooray! We get to read the next chapter! Anyways, I'm back for another review. Great job, by the way. So, grammar-wise, just a few typos and awkwardly worded dependent clauses. ...
Feb 10, 2014 -
Re: Rise Again - Chapter 2 - Full
I like her name. Vaera just looks so much cooler than plain old 'Vera'. Anywho... I'm back! First things first, I caught a huge typo. In one of the first ...
Feb 8, 2014 -
Re: Heroes - Chapter 2 - Part 1
Yay! You kept going! Thanks for telling me, Scoeri! Anyways, onwards and upwards! First off, grammar: Awesome job mixing up your structures and incorporating structures similar to Old English. Very ...
Feb 3, 2014
