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Re: A Train Ride
Beautiful. Only thing I can suggest is tinkering with the line about the airport. It seems a bit redundant. Amazing work.
Apr 19, 2018 -
Re: Knives With Lies
Hang in there bud :)
Mar 28, 2018 -
Re: Life or Death?
Thats nice. This is nice. :)
Mar 26, 2018 -
Re: Knives With Lies
Hi! Thank you for sharing your work with me. While I do love reviewing your work I would rather not be tagged in them. I may not have enough time ...
Mar 26, 2018 -
Re: Dude your only a senior calm down.
XD didn't realize this came off as edgy. Thanks for your review.
Mar 24, 2018 -
Re: i wish our love for music could translate into love for each other
Great closing line. Otherwise it feels like an outline for a poem. There is plenty of feeling but not much else. Try describing existing feelings in different ways. Keep writing!
Mar 22, 2018 -
Re: Dude your only a senior calm down.
gives review. likes 2 year old work. FeelsBadMan
Mar 19, 2018 -
Re: You Tell Me Things I Never Thought I Would Hear From A Man Who Loved Me
Brain malfunctioned and tried to reload the page. Apparently if you do that it just posts your previous post again.
Feb 28, 2018 - Re: You Tell Me Things I Never Thought I Would Hear From A Man Who Loved Me Feb 27, 2018
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Re: You Tell Me Things I Never Thought I Would Hear From A Man Who Loved Me
You cannot write a poem while only looking at one aspect of emotion. Simply put, you cannot write an evocative piece (such as what you aimed to do here) by ...
Feb 27, 2018 -
Re: Music
As a writer I believe you have a great idea. However, your ideas need a proper format. I usually do not comment on format but one cannot deny that it ...
Feb 11, 2018 -
Re: lost in the unreal
Amazing work. You give such visceral details that paints a detailed image with just a couple lines. Your 4th stanza does lack a bit of feeling although I couldn't tell ...
Feb 9, 2018 -
Re: you swallowed me whole
Very nice. Beautiful use of metaphor and imagery. It is a bit vague though. Try explaining what happened and how. I'm sure this would make your work much more evocative.
Jan 30, 2018 -
Re: Broken Records Lyrics At One O'clock
Ignore this post. YWS freaked out in me
Jan 30, 2018 -
Re: Broken Records Lyrics At One O'clock
Quite nice. Well done
Jan 30, 2018
