Staarryskyy

Personally the line " and ignore their ever little wink, " bothered me. Here's my suggestion to what it could be replaced with, "And into ourselves we'll sink" or their ...

I really like the imagery in the beginning, with the ocean and pier, you have an error here though where you say " but that might just the hazy rain ...

I think the way you've arranged the little sections is uneven throughout. All in all I do like the concept of this work. The rhyming is random throughout the work, ...

Hey buddy, I know this is a few years old but I told you already that I was gonna review a whole bunch of random stuff. I'll try and not ...

This is a very good idea but I feel like it's just missing a few things to make it perfect. well one thing is that its hard to figure out ...