Snowery

Hullo Alvarin!! I'm back again!! Take it easy, Ryan He has a name! Yay! Okay, like Birko said the way that you tell your story is confusing but not unpleasantly ...

Hey Alvarin! Silver back to review for you!! :) Wow, I think I'm in love with this story. There's just so much intrigue, such heavy atmosphere and such well done ...

Hey Alvarin! Silver here to review for you! :) Well, Birky's been here already which means your work has probably been picked clean of nitpicks but I'll do my beat ...

Hey Noelle, I'm back for another chapter!! So, no nit picks. Yay! So I'll be rambling on content today. I agree with the other two about the info dump. I ...

Tenyo! Hi! It's Silver here to review for you! :) *Takes a deep breath before exhaling* Wow, just wow. That was amazing, just breathtaking. It's the best prologue I've ever ...

Hullo! *Throws Silvery glitter everywhere* Main Points prospects sickened her to her core. Although it's not wrong, the close repetition of "her" makes for disjointed reading. I would suggest replacin

Hey Sherri! Silver here back with another review! :) Main Points A woman who is but is not herself. I feel like you're missing a word here. the fourth time ...

Hey Alchemist! Silver here to review for you this fine day!! :) So let's get to it! :) Main Points He was laying in the pitch darkness, Laying Should be ...

Well, I'm back again after a well deserved (at least I think so) brownie break. Main Points At the very edge of the Woods, When you write a sentence like ...

I'm back again! Yes! D Main Points judged by how silent the walls were, This sounds a little funny, maybe try "judging"? Oh, by the way I thought that this ...

Hey Aria! I'm back! Again :) Main Points He stopped as if he walked into a tree, "He stopped as if he had walked into a tree," a deep cut ...

Hey Aria! Silver here to review for you! :) Wow, it's been a while since I've reviewed one of your previous chapters, sorry, it's kind of hard sometimes to keep ...

Hey Gaurav! Silver here to review your story!! :) Main Points "You have lost your mind! It's a suspense story, not a dramedy," I think that "You have lost your ...

Hey Sherri!! Silver back to review another chapter! :) Main Points their immortality, inhuman strength and mental power, I feel that this would be better as a new sentence. Maybe ...

Hey Sherri! Silver back to do another review! Main Points But the cool morning air Remember, we can't start sentences with "but", "and" or "because" unless in first person or ...